We are the Chapman's, my friends...

9 years ago today...

2012-02-03T10:38:00.000-06:00

Have y'all missed me? You know Summer Self goes into hiding during the dark, cold months! Although, it has been really nice here in Alabama!

Anyway, 9 years ago today...I remember that the night before I had a huge bacon cheeseburger that Daddy made for me. I remember that I got up at 4:00 a.m. to shower and put on make-up. I remember that I drove a Ford Explorer (which I loved!!!). Most of all I remember that as Daddy pulled off the interstate onto University Boulevard, we had about 7 minutes until we'd arrive at St. Vincent's so I could give birth to our first child. And, as we pulled onto University, I begged him to turn around and take me back home. I. WAS. SCARED!!!!! We had done everything from decorating a room to birthing and breastfeeding classes, but we had no idea what we were getting into and there was no turning back. All I could think of was watermelon through a nostril, and what if I don't get an epidural and I can feel all of this pain!!! Now, today, I remember very little about the pain except that my epidural was wearing off when that precious angel finally entered this world.

Her name is Elizabeth Rae. She is named after my mother (Linda Elizabeth) and Daddy's sister (Sunny, who is in Heaven now watching over her little nieces). Elizabeth after mother and Rae is Sunny's little "Rae" of sunshine. She came out screaming and has never shut up!!! When we brought her home, we had no idea what we were doing, but we figured it out along the way. We still don't know what we're doing, but we figure it out each day. She was a skinny baby and she loved to be rocked to sleep every night while listening to the ocean sounds CD we bought for her. She loved her Pac n' Play and kept all of her toys in there. She said her first words at six months old, no lie, and those words were a sentence! "Bye bye Da Da". She talks incessantly now, and most of the time we listen. Sometimes we have to tune her out. She is the new "Mouth of the South", just like her Mama!!! She learned to run, not walk, when she was 11 months old and hasn't slowed down since!

Elizabeth Rae, or Beebs as we call her, is more precious to me each day. She loves unconditionally; she's smart, she's strong and strong-willed; she can play a mean defense in basketball; she loves her sister, even though she doesn't want anyone to know that. She loves her Daddy and The (stupid) University of Alabama as much as he does. She still loves her rag doll, Felicity, that she got from her Aunt Nonny when she was three months old. She hates homework (who doesn't!), but loves to go to school and loves her 3rd grade teacher and her friends. She loves to help Mrs. Marcum with the special needs kids in her class and loves them unconditionally! She loves our pets and her fish, Ingram. She loves our neighborhood and her 3DS. She doesn't eat much, but she does love Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream, which just so happens to be my favorite. She stands up for her friends and her beliefs. She loves God, our small church and can say The Lord's Prayer like a grown up. She really really loves to sing and put on shows for us. She wants to be the next Internet sensation and has a video on YouTube that's had 19 views:). She is dramatic and loud and full of life! She is ours and we are so blessed to have such a wonderful gift from God!

Happy 9th Birthday sweet Beebs! I love you with all my heart and I am so proud to be your Mommy!!!

I Do

2011-09-28T08:52:00.000-05:00

Fifteen years ago today I said it! I have said every day since and will say it every day til death do us part!

You see, today is the day, 15 years ago, that I married the love of my life. He is patient, well he was until we had kids:). He is kind and he loves me with all his heart and soul! I was 16 the first time we actually met. We were best friends for 8 years, then started dating when I was 23. Then, on April 23rd, 1996, he proposed to me. On his 28th birthday. He had been holding on to the ring since Christmas. And, yes, he's still a procrastinator. Perhaps he's just laid back, he likes to do things in his own time. We have been through a lot together. Infertility was our first big obstacle. But, now we have two beautiful girls that have completed us and bound us even closer together. We have a loving home and a loving marriage. God has blessed us with many gifts and carried us through tough times and watched us soar in easier times.

Everett holds my heart and my hand. He kisses me every day. He holds me tight every night. He loves me unconditionally. I am the luckiest girl on this earth! Happy 15th Anniversary, Ev. I love you more than words could ever express! I do...I do...I do...I do...I do...

Well, that's it! It's all big teeth and bad attitudes now...

2011-08-24T14:13:00.000-05:00

Yep, you guessed it! My baby started Kindergarten.

Let me back up a bit though. This is my SHY SHY SHY baby. Which is weird, because neither Daddy nor me nor Beebs is shy in the least. Anyway, we went to meet the teacher the week before school started and she not only held on to my leg the entire time, she hid behind it as well. And, her classroom is not with the other K classrooms. Needless to say, I was a basket case for the rest of the day. And, I had to to to work! I fretted and cried and worried over my baby all day. Then I came home. They were staying with my sister. She met me in the garage and stopped me before I got out of the car...something that has never happened. She then informed me that Annie had 1. cleaned up her room without being asked, 2. made up her bed without being asked and 3. well, I can't remember the third one because I was in shock and must not have heard her. This child doesn't do anything without being asked and when you do ask all she does is whine!!! It occurred to me then that she was, in fact, ready for big school because those things are only done by big girls. So, now I just had to get through dropping her off on the first day...

On the first day, my Annie got HERSELF out of bed. She has NEVER gotten herself out of bed. I have to carry these people to the kitchen and sit them at the table each and every day. Needless to say, I was, again, shocked. She got herself dressed after being asked only one time. This never happens! Certainly not in my house and I'd be willing to bet it doesn't happen in yours either. If it does, you are either a liar or an alien. So, we set off walking to school, the three of us, Beebs, Annie and me, since our tradition is to walk to school on the first day. I was fine. I had been through my basket case phase the week before. No problem. Except, Beebs kept asking if I was going to be okay. I finally had to tell her to stop asking me! She was getting me all worked up. We made it to school.

We stopped and took a picture before my baby walked through those huge double doors...

She walked in right behind her big sister and I walked away. I made it all the way to the end of the sidewalk and then I sobbed. My babies are big now. They have lost teeth...and now they have the big teeth coming in. I guess I'll blink and they'll be teenagers with bad attitudes! Dammit...I'm sorry mom for being such a bitchy teenager and I love you with all my heart!

June Kitty Cash...the Great

2011-07-20T13:20:00.000-05:00

SHE CAME HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I.cannot.believe.it!!! Maybe the curse of Not the Summer of George has been lifted. I don't know where she was, but she is mute, so whether it was a garage, attic or car, no one would have heard her. She opens her mouth in a "Meow" formation, but nothing comes out. http://www.youtube.com/whttp://youtu.be/vN17L5Gb_gA

Daddy came rushing into the bedroom this morning at 5:50 AM, shaking me awake and saying, "Guess who just showed up on our doorstep, skinny as hell?!?!?!"

I thought, "Oh dear God, he's let a drug addict in our house !" But, instead of saying that out loud, I simply asked who.

"JUNEBUG!" He said she came walking down the sidewalk after him, looked up and mouthed a Meow. He opened the door, she walked in and jumped into the windowsill, which is her favorite perch.

Oh, and she was weighing in at about 15 or 16 pounds when she disappeared SIX WEEKS AGO. Now, she's probably down to about 9 or so pounds. I think she might be down to 8 lives now.

Maybe I should have someone lock me in the garage for a couple of weeks...Nah, I'm going to Jackson!

Transition

2011-07-14T14:46:00.000-05:00

Transition

part of speech: noun

definition: change, often major

Synonyms: alteration, changeover, conversion, development, evolution, flux, growth, metamorphosis, passage, progression, shift, transformation, transit, turning point, upheaval

So, 40 has seen lots of transition for me...I don't do change well...I tend to overeat...and not good stuff like apples and salads. No, I go for the white powdered sugar doughnuts! My friend Susie says, "I think I am back up to my full term pregnant weight...I just need to give birth!" Right there with you friend!

Anyway, I have made a decision to have a "CALM FALL". Maybe that will make the transition from Summer Self to Fall Self much easier, even though Summer Self ain't on top of her game right now! We are taking a year off from dance! We are not going back to Girl Scouts! We will be all things sports this Fall...Annie is already enrolled in soccer, and the Beebs will be going back to her true sports love of basketball in the Winter. Of course Daddy is ready for them to take some sort of music lesson, but I'm just trying to figure out how they will get home from school. Yes, I said they...my Annie starts Kindergarten this Fall. She's pumped and I am too, kinda, maybe a little sad...she is my baby after all. Okay, I'm tearing up...

My current transition is that of our Pastor and his wife leaving our little church to move to a new church and a house on the beach...kinda makes me want to go to Seminary. Ha. Ha. Ha. I'll leave that to the professionals! Their last Sunday with us was this past one, and it was emotional for a big ole' crybaby like me. Daddy was sweet to hold my hand all the way through though. We said our goodbyes, which of course are not forever goodbyes and sent them on their way with a love offering and a book of notes and pictures from the congregation. That is, minus notes from my family because I lost the paper we were to use and then didn't get them turned in on time. I ROCK at being organized. I would love to have everything in its place and a place for everything, but my children hinder that greatly!!! Anyway, Pat baptized both of my children, gave fantastic sermons and is a very laid back, sweet and kind man. In his sermon from Ash Wednesday 2010 (I think it was 2010), he said these words, "Fast from anger and feast on optimism. Fast from self concern and feast on compassion for others."

Fabulous words to live by! So fabulous that I have them taped to my computer screen at work. His sermons always found a way to speak directly to me. And his wife, a precious friend who is a strong and admirable lady! She's not afraid to speak her mind and she truly is my precious friend. As I was thinking about this transition earlier this week, I realized that when you are 14 years old and your Youth Director leaves and you think that nothing will ever be okay again, it's a lot different when you are 40 and your pastor leaves. When you are 40, you have been through a couple of changes and you know all will be well again. So, maybe I'm a little okay with change since I can see a bright side to it. Anyway, here's to my dear friends, Pat and Marcia...you have been a wonderful part of our lives and we will miss you greatly! (Okay, I made myself cry again). And please, consider this the Chapman note that didn't make it into the book.

Here's a little update on what we've been talking about...

Beebs: "I didn't know the Target stayed up that late!"

Annie: "NO!"

Annie: "Uh oh, it looks like Strawberry Shortcake got a sharkbite..." (that's a whole other post though)

Beebs: "I don't want to wash my hair, I washed it a couple of days ago..." (that's the stinch I smell)

Annie: "NO!" (Annie's been telling me NO alot lately, which is why she is grounded from Mermaid Barbie until tomorrow - I love the POWER, insert evil laugh)

Stay tuned for my latest project and be on the lookout for the "Shark Bite Barbie" post! It will even have pictures!

Heart your everchanging always the same Chapman, me:)

NOT the Summer of George!

2011-07-06T12:38:00.000-05:00

Well, Summer Self is usually waaaaaaaaaaaay happy by now...but I don't think this is turning out to be the Summer of George. At least I can still find humor in it:).

I haven't been posting lately, so I thought I'd just give you a brief rundown of what we've been talking about lately...

So, the 4th of July, found us at the neighborhood pool. By the way, we (me) had endured fits of rage from a very persistent 8 year old the day before because I had things to do at home and refused to take her to the pool. Anyway, we arrived, applied sunscreen to the Beebs and then it thundered. And then it thundered some more and then we went home...then it stormed and the power went out. The Beebs was so mad at Mother Nature that she demanded to know, "Can't we send her an email or something? This is ruining my pool plans!!!" Later when asked what Mother Nature's email address was, she replied, "mothernature@gmail.com." Smart-aleck! She gets that honest though!

Now, in this NOT Summer of George, my sister has been staying with us (moved in and took over Daddy's bathroom as the Beebs would tell you). She has two dogs. So, along with our little LuLu, we now have Pearl and Blu (Blu is a girl by the way, that's why there is no "e" on the end you fool!). When they arrived, LuLu was in heat. Now Pearl is in heat. Now Blu thinks that she is actually a boy and won't stop humping the small dogs. I'm talking really bad doggie porn going on that Daddy really wants to capture on his iPhone and post on YouTube, if he could only get the right lighting. It is all very disturbing!

Meanwhile, my prized cat (the killer of all things small - creatures that is), June Kitty Cash, has moved on to bigger and better things. I'm not sure if that happens to be Heaven or a home without three humping dogs residing in the back yard. I think I'd trade all three of them for my Junebug. I'm going to miss the dead shrews, chipmunks, moles, birds, etc. left lovingly for me right at the bottom of the laundry chute. Beebs suggested that Junebug must have left because she needed another "fixed shot".

Oh, and Annie painted a piece of her beautiful blond hair with red spray paint! Now people at the Target are going to think I took my 5 year old to the salon to have a pink (it's faded a bit) highlight in her hair! Yeah, I did that...just for the first day of Kindergarten!!!

More on my new project and Annie's 4th of July scooter and bicycle parade...

Who's in charge of Mother Nature?

2011-05-17T12:56:00.000-05:00

It's COLD here in Alabama! And the sky is gray to boot...I'm slipping back into my Seasonal Affective Disorder. This morning, my precious (and quite hilarious) Annie was giving me a lesson on how Mother Nature controls the weather.

"That's why it's cold Mommy, cause Muddah Natah made it cold. She's in charge of the weddah.", she explained.

"Well, who's in charge of Mother Nature?" I asked.

"Justin Bieber!" she replied with all the confidence of JB's #1 fan.

I fell out laughing and she quickly changed her answer, "I mean Jesus!"

At least I know that the child loves Jesus. Why just the other day on the way to school she asked, "Mommy, what if Jesus only made Jeeps?"

By the way, and not to leave the Beebs out, but our little Annie had quite a week last week.

She graduated from preschool.

She made her first goal in soccer.

And, she got an iPod shuffle for graduation.

(yeah, it's my old one, but she thinks it's new)

I'm thinking the iPod is the reason for the constant Justin Bieber noise in my head...Annie sings JB really loud and constantly. I am singing Runaway Love right now. And, I know every word. I might be Steven Tyler...Does the noise in my head bother you?

Pasties, the new Lieutenant Dan and a little help from a little friend

2011-05-04T13:44:00.000-05:00

I know the title of this post is a twisted one, but...welcome to my world!

Have I told y'all that Annie has an obsession with band-aids and tattoos? Well, she does. Last week her buddy, T, was over playing and she had just gotten some new tattoos. I think she must have given T at least 6 tattoos. Guess where she decided two of them needed to go? Yep, she made pasties out of them! Then last night, she got into the shiny silver Band-aids. Guess where she decided two of those silver stickers needed to be? You guessed right again, she made pasties out of them. Daddy and I were on the deck and here she came in her Hello Kitty panties and shiny silver band-aid pasties. Yes, I said on the deck...meaning outside! And then I said to Daddy, "Honey, she's made pasties out of Band-aids." There's a sentence I thought would NEVER cross my lips...

Lt. Dan...Annie flipped the Beebs off the hammock onto the ground the other afternoon...here's what followed in the next 2 hours...

"Mommy, Daddy, I can't walk! Both of my legs are broken!" This in her best "working up the tears" whiny voice. She dragged herself up the stairs from the backyard without using her legs, just her arms. See, Lt. Dan. Can't you just visualize it now. She laid on the floor of the deck fake crying the whole time. That is, until, Daddy turned off the grill, got Annie out of the tub and said, "Mommy, get your purse, we're going to the hospital to get a shot!"

Then, she was up and at 'em, running like Forrest!

On a serious note, we have been praying for all of our neighboring cities and counties that were hit so hard by last week's tornadoes...

My Beebs made fliers ("Raise money to help hurt people!") and she and her good buddy, EG, collected $19.50 to send to Pleasant Grove. They also had a lemonade stand last weekend to raise even more money. I would love to show you a picture of the poster they made for that, but the dog peed on it:). The final count on how much money she raised there is still out (she hasn't counted it yet).

Zook and Jesus

2011-04-19T13:50:00.001-05:00

Can you tell I'm ready for summer? Yes, I changed my picture to one of my angels jumping into the pool! My brain is gearing up for my "blog season". I think winter gives me writer's block! I log in and start to type, but it's just a sad jumbled mess! Have I mentioned lately how I despise cold weather and nightfall at 4 p.m.?!!?!?!

On to Zook (actually Zoosk)...I was on the phone with my sister the other night and we were discussing her recent break up with the worst boyfriend ever, and my Beebs was sitting right beside me, of course, eavesdropping. She immediately perked up and said, "I have an idea! Nahnie should join Zook."

"Join huh?" I said.

"You know, Mommy, the place on the Internet where you can meet nice dates." Watch TV much Beebs? And what channel is she watching to see Zoosk commercials!? Yep, Mother of the Year right here;).

Lots of my posts deal with Jesus...or should I say, Annie has lots of Jesus questions. The girls and I went to church without Daddy on Sunday. It was Palm Sunday and Communion Sunday. After a brief description (for the 50th time) of the Lord's Supper in the best whisper I could muster up, the Elders distributed the "bread". Now the bread in our little Chapel is made of Pillsbury Pie Crusts which have been rolled out on a cookie sheet and brushed with butter. I know, YUMMMMMMMYYYYYY! My kids love, love, absolutely love Communion because of the "bread" and they get grape juice too. Beebs went so far as to take two, yes I said two, pieces of the bread from the serving plate. But I digress. Right about the time we got our tiny grape juice and Annie spilled a little because she had to get the fullest tiny cup on the tray, she looked over at me and said, "Mommy, did Jesus get married?" Where in the world did she come up with that in the midst of all the chaos. It was such a sweet question, but really? It's Palm Sunday. Jesus is about to die on the Cross for our sins and then rise on the 3rd day, and you want to know if he got married?

Lord help me...

Focusing on God during Lent...

2011-03-09T13:08:00.000-06:00

I read this Lenten Devotional last night that was included in our church's weekly newsletter and it set the right perspective for me for Lent.

This year I am giving up something that has been a part of my life for too long and putting my full faith in God that he will carry me through. I will direct my eyes to Him...

Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. ~ Psalm 51:1

By: Henri Nouwen

Our temptation in Lent is to be so impressed by our sins and failings and so overwhelmed by our lack of generosity that we get stuck in a paralyzing guilt that leads to introspection instead of directing our eyes to God. It is guilt that becomes an idol and form of pride.

But Lent is precisely the time to break down this idol and to direct our attention to our loving Lord. The question is: “Are we like Judas, who was so overcome by his sin that he could not believe in God’s mercy any longer and hanged himself? Or are we like Peter, who returned to his Lord with repentance and cried bitterly for his sins?

“You are dust, and to dust you will return.” This ancient formula will be heard by millions of Christians all over the world this Ash Wednesday as the sign of the cross is made in ashes on their forehead. This symbolic act is both a solemn reminder and an invitation to renewal.

Lord God, this Lent help us to do our best to keep our minds fixed on you and your Kingdom.

Ya gotta love...

2010-10-12T22:26:00.000-05:00

when your baby (actually not so much a baby anymore, but my baby) falls asleep trying to finish reading "Ramona the Brave"! I went in to kiss her goodnight and she begged me to let her finish it since she's had it checked out for, ummm, 3 weeks I think! She only has 5 pages left, but she just couldn't make it. Maybe during independent reading time tomorrow before library time? I mean, she's read 177 pages in three weeks! She's only in 2nd grade! That ROCKS!!

when Annie poops in the potty 4 times in one day. I told y'all she was full of it! I made the rule that she cannot go on the playground at school with her friends until she poops. Worked like a charm! And, I made the rule that she can't play outside at home until she poops. Worked like a charm...except that it didn't all come out when she was sitting on the potty! Score: Mommy 5, Annie 2! I'M WINNING!

when your best friends create the best birthday party ever for you! My Chickens (official shout out to my angel girlfriends) are truly my sisters! I love you G & D! Y'all more than rock!!! And, all my favorite girls (Anna, Susan, Dana, Leigh and Emily) and fav hubby's of my fav girls came too! Even my nephew and his precious angel girlfriend (Emily) came.

Even though D spied on what I was wearing and decided it would be best if she wore the SAME EXACT shirt, I don't mind...

40 and rockin'!!!!

Things I've learned, things I know to be true, and whole lotta nothin'...

2010-10-07T21:53:00.001-05:00

In 40 years...I'm feeling nostalgic this week. Like the end of an era and the beginning of a new one. Like I need to go have my roots done real quick. Like maybe I should do a lot of things different. I think my next decade will be one of accepting my faults.

I have learned that patience are hard to come by. It's okay to not act your age. I have learned how to say no to my kids. I like vampires named Edward Cullen. The dollar movie is not all it's cracked up to be even though it's only a dollar. I have the best husband in the world. I am not sure how I got so lucky, but God and fate brought us together after 8 years of friendship, 2 years of dating and 14 years of marriage. I have learned that being married to your best friend makes life way easier and way happier. I have also learned that marriage takes a lot of teamwork, a whole lot of give and take and sometimes it's best to bite your tongue rather than say what's about to cross your lips! I have learned to thank God every day for my Mom and to apologize to her every chance I get. I have also learned that you truly do reap what you sow, so watch out. I have learned that getting pregnant can take years, being pregnant sucks, giving birth is pretty easy (after the first one that is), and that raising kids is a lot harder than I thought it would be. Being a Mommy, though, is the only job I ever wanted and it is the most precious job I've ever had. I know that God intended for me to be the Mommy of girls, my girls, because I wouldn't know the first thing about peeing standing up and playing ball. I have learned that 40 isn't old at all, it's a little wiser than 20, sounds more fun than 30, and it's right around the corner.

Poetry makes me happy; both writing it and reading it. Barbie clothes laid out to dry on the bathroom counter crack me up! I know I never would have made it as an elementary school teacher, which is what I aspired to be my entire life. Instead, I take care of 1 person who really needs someone to care for him. Caring for those who really need it is easy. Having sympathy for those who bring the trials of life on themselves is really hard. I think it is impossible. Being grown up is not acting your age, rather taking responsibility. Each time you buy a house, the mortgage gets a little bit higher. Eight year old girls are competitive. Who knew? Four year old girls still have nap mat fits. So do 40 year old girls, just not as often. Sometimes the thought of one more chore is a chore to think about. Mad Men is an awesome show! Vacuum cleaners don't last long in my house. The scent of lemon pine sol is much better than the original scent. Having candles lit in your home is only for when adults are there. Carpets should be cleaned once a year. Toilets should be cleaned once a week or more. Sheets should be changed once a week or more unless you weigh 40 pounds and sleep on 1 square inch of the bed. Pets are a precious part of life.

I think it is hilarious when people pronounce words the wrong way and call things the wrong name. You gotta laugh at something. Being a smart-ass makes me who I am. It's part of my coping ability. I think that families should live close to one another. Did I mention that I have an amazing husband?

It is very important to work as a team and listen to what others have to say. Your way is not always the best way.

There are way more (hopefully) things that I have learned and that I know, but right now, what you see is what you get. I do know that as I put my babies to bed tonight, I made sure to tell them that the two of them and their Daddy are the best people that have entered my life!

I know at 40 I am the luckiest GIRL in the world!!!

The Nanny McPhee Pirate

2010-09-21T20:42:00.000-05:00

Yes, THAT TOOTH is loose in my Beebs' head! This week she has been Nanny McPhee, what with the tooth and all...

Don't you love the mole!?!?!?!

The pirate look comes in because this afternoon as she was sprinting home from the neighbors house, she fell on a stick that poked her in the eye. The cold washrag (always a cure-all) HAD to be tied to her eye with a rubberband! Her always resourceful Mommy (patting self on back) of course found a nice elastic headband that works great for that pirate patch (not so much for the hair, but great for the pirate look)...


A pirate in the making!

You know, if that tooth is still hanging on in about 5 weeks, she could really be Nanny McPhee for Halloween!

Baby Chick

2010-09-21T15:00:00.000-05:00

This morning as Beebs was eating her boiled egg, minus the yolk of course, she asked me the sweetest question.

"Mommy, is the yolk where the baby chick was?"

"Yes, it is Beebs," only half paying attention...until she asked...

"Well, how do they get the egg back in the shell after the baby chick comes out?"

I couldn't bear and wouldn't dare to tell her that she was eating the baby chick. It would freak her out for life and she would never eat eggs again, which is the only thing she knows how to cook and someday she's going to have to take care of me!

"Jesus told us not to eat each other's food, MOMMY!"

2010-09-15T22:31:00.000-05:00

Yeah, I ate a bite of the Froot Loops, but they looked so yummy. I have been walking REEEEEAAAAAAALLLLLLLYYYYYY early in the morning with my neighbor, and I am TIRED! Why in the world is this wearing me out so? Anyway, Annie and I came home this afternoon and had about an hour and a half before we had to get the Beebs from dance. So I decided we should lay on the bed and watch Animal Plant (I would have rather watched Friends, 19 Kids and Counting or HGTV, but I needed her to want to stay inside!). We watched "My Dog Ate What?". Crazy show, weird stuff that they ate. Anyway, I promptly dozed off. Ahhhhhh. She was very still. Ahhhhhh. She woke me up 10 minutes before we needed to leave to pick up the Beebs with a HUGE bowl of cereal.

"You can't eat that in my bed," I told her. "Let me carry it to the kitchen for you."

She handed it over and we headed to the kitchen. This is where the bite came in. Dang Froot Loops are good! They remind me of breakfast at my Granny's. She would get up at 4 a.m. to make a huge breakfast, but she always gave us Froot Loops too, and a Coke. She ROCKED!! (More later on my precious Granny, but as a preview, think of the best Granny EVER! That was her!)

Anyway, she saw me eating her precious snack and blessed me out! Yeah, she's 4...

"Mommy, why did you take a bite? Now I have to add 4 more Froot Loops to my bowl to make up for the one's you ate!"

"Fine," I told her as I was pouring my own bowl of the most delicious kid's cereal in the world.

"You know Mommy, Jesus told us not to eat each other's food!"

As I always say, only from the moufs of my precious angel babes!

"No, Annie, Jesus told us to share."

I swear, this kid uses Jesus way too much to get her way. I am proud of all the Bible verses she's learning in her Pre-K class this year though. You wouldn't believe what a little sponge mind can remember.

Goodbye Sweet Summer Rose...I'll miss you so (with a tear in my eye)!

2010-09-06T21:36:00.002-05:00

Sweet Summer Rose, my dearest, most precious, angel self! I do love Summer!!! Apparently so does the Beebs. We went to the neighborhood pool for the LAST time today and stayed 'til the bitter end of the last Courtesy Break of the entire Summer. Ahhhhh, waaaaaaaahhhhhh, boo hoo! As we were leaving, the Beebs took the time to say goodbye to each pool chair, the diving board, the shallow end, the well, the deep end, the bathrooms and, of course, the HUGELY loved snack and drink machines. I, Summer (self) Rose, had tear-filled eyes as we pulled away. Daddy wondered why I sat in the back seat on the way home. It was because I didn't want him to see my cry:(.

Y'all, school is in full swing, dance too and Wednesday night church starts this week, but I can't quite grasp the fact that football is also in full swing and the pool is closed until May!

All I can say is, say a prayer for Summer Rose, cause she turns 40 in a month. Do ya think that helps the fact that summer is over? Huh, do ya? NO! My last summer as a GIRL (in my mind) is over! 40 isn't old though, is it?

Here is your que to leave a sweet comment about how young I am and how young I look...

My onion letter (with an orchid note)...

2010-08-26T20:48:00.003-05:00

A few years back, I read an article (I wish I could remember where, but I found a blog post about it here) about an onion letter and an orchid letter. I think it was written by a flight attendant and she told the dif between the two. The airline would get good letters and bad letters. The good were titled "orchid letters" and the bad, "onion letters". This is my take on an onion letter for all of you bloggers that might be interested!

Why is it when you go to a fast food restaurant (Chick-Fil-A last night) they insist that you get a medium drink with the Combo that you order? I'm just sayin'...

My sweet angels now like to order off of the "adult" menu at CFA. They no longer want the nuggets, but the chicken sandwich. Last night we had a treat for dinner. We had CFA. As I'm giving (screaming) my order over the loudspeaker, I requested a small lemonade with both "Combo #1's". The reply was, "Ma'am, the combos come with a medium drink."

"Okay," I answered.

But, why? Can't I just get what I want? After all, they are in the customer service industry sort of. I mean they are precious friendly people, really they are. But, I have two small children who have two small bladders and they will keep Daddy and me up all night with a MEDIUM lemonade. I.JUST.WANT.A.SMALL!!!!

Then, today I had to go to the FedEx store. Now, keep in mind that it is the FEDEX store. I didn't have the account number with me, but this shouldn't be a problem, because I'm at the FEDEX store. "Sir, I don't have the account number, could you look it up for me?" No, I don't have access to that information. How does the FEDEX store not have my FEDEX information. It is the FEDEX store, right? Then, he couldn't ring up my paper purchase at his register because his register was only for FEDEX SHIPPING. Again, can't find my shipping account number at the register/computer that was for FEDEX SHIPPING, and now, he can't take my money. Double whammy! I remembered as I stood there waiting for him to wrap my package (which took 30 minutes, but I did thank him for doing such a nice job), this is why I switched to UPS! So, the FedEx shipping experience was only used in a dire situation! That makes me wonder why there is no UPS Store within reach that I can use...should I write an onion letter about that?

Are all companies this difficult? I run into it all the time with my job. My job is to make a person's life easier. I do a really good job at that (patting self on back now). My boss and I are Colonel Potter and Radar. Isn't making life easier what these "customer service" oriented businesses are supposed to be about? I do it, why can't they?

I know, it's a soapbox, but does anybody hear the pleas of the simple American Mommy/Wife/Executive Assistant?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

On an orchid note, I had to contact my credit card company today and they were simply delightful! I cannot say enough about how pleasant and helpful Ms. Gonzalez was as well as Marcus. They were both so helpful and so kind! Thank you to them both!

Limos, The Hulk and Rattles, oh my...

2010-08-19T21:28:00.007-05:00

As you may or may not know, I started this blog to keep family and friends up to date on all things Beebs and Annie (my two precious angels). So, here are a few outtakes from the last few weeks of life with words and sayings that only come from the "moufs" of my babes (should I change the blog name to that or what?)

Limos:
Annie after a big storm we had a few weeks ago..."Mommy, should I go out in the yard and pick up all the 'LIMOS'?" You know, the limbs! Beebs wasted no time in correcting her, by the way. Like she knows what she's talking about, hence the Hulk.

Hulk:
Beebs going to work with me last week..."Mommy, there's the Statue of Liberty!" They get so excited about it and I hardly even notice it after 15 years of passing it daily. "Yep Beebs, she's facing downtown where her home was 20 years ago," I replied. "Mommy, do you think she's looking at the Hulk?" Beebs asked. "The Hulk? What in the world are you talking about?" I questioned. "You know, her boyfriend, the Hulk! The big statue with his butt (yes she said butt mother) showing!" she answered. "Ohhhhhhhh, you mean Vulcan! Yes, I think she's looking at Vulcan, who is her boyfriend, but not the Hulk, who turns green and his clothes rip off when he's mad." Yes people, only from the moufs of babes!

Rattles:
Yeah, rattles. Well, we had a mouse (most likely a rat, but Daddy didn't want to freak me out too bad), that lived in our walls last winter. We could hear him scratching around inside the walls day and night. All I could picture was Jerry from "Tom and Jerry" making that little arch shaped hole in the wall so he could come out at night and get something from the fridge. Anyway, Annie was laying (rolling around like a wild idiot) on our bed the other day and we heard something. I can't remember exactly what it was now, but I'm pretty sure it was Daddy messing around in the garage. I do know that it wasn't the mouse/rat because I'm pretty sure it's not in the hot attic or walls during the hottest time of the year! Anyway (again), I told Annie to hush (shut her big fat mouth - not really, but only in the minds of Mommies) so we could figure out what the noise was. Please note that she (and Beebs and Daddy) talks non-freaking-stop and I haven't been able to hear myself think through the major part of my thirties, aka post-kid! After the whole shushing thing, Annie said (in her non-freaking-stop talking kind of way), "Hey Mommy, I fink de Rattle is back." Yes folks, she was talking about the mouse/rat. Apparently, Daddy told them it was a rat. Hmmmm, maybe that's why they won't go downstairs by themselves...

I'm tellin' y'all, only from the moufs of babes!

My happy place...

2010-08-14T22:15:00.016-05:00

Thank you Rhoda at Southern Hospitality! You are an inspiration! I first saw Rhoda's staircase redo over at The Lettered Cottage. My stairs had been in a world of hurt for quite a while. You see, they are hardwood, but had been stained in, oh, 1963 or 1964 when our house was built. Then, they had a weird rubber old lady runner thing on them, then they had been covered in carpet, which was absolutely, ridiculously disgusting when we moved in and I was 6 months pregnant. Note to self and all those in blog world, please don't EVER move when you are pregnant, especially if your "new" old house has 1960's paneling and carpeted stairs!!! I cried and I cried and I cried and I almost made Daddy cry when I said, "I think we bought the wrong house!" on the day we closed. But, ugly 1960's paneling is something that can be beautified with a little paint, Praise the Good Lord, and thank Him for great parents who paint because you can't/shouldn't when you are 6 months pregnant!!! But, I digress. So, here are my stairs to begin with...

So, yes, quite hideous! I know you are asking yourself, "Why, why in the world have you lived with this for 5 LOOOOONNNNNGGGGG years?" Well, let me just tell you that they were carpeted when we moved in. We had all the carpeting replaced (it was nasty and was an absolute requirement from an insane pregnant woman who asked Daddy to dig up Jasper the Cat that we had buried in the back yard of our last precious home to move him to the back yard of our new/old home so he would still be with us...another story for another day). The stairs were carpeted when we bought the house, so we assumed we would just replace the carpet on the stairs as well. Bing, bang, boom and DONE. Not so fast! When the carpet layers (also puller uppers) took the carpet off the stairs, they realized that the "down" stairs were hardwood just like the "up" stairs. We live in a split foyer home (I swore I would never live in a split foyer home because they were TOO dark, but I do love our home, and I knew it would be our home the minute we walked in, pink walls, 1960's tile, hideous wallpaper, paneling and all). Again, digressing. The moral of that whole story is, don't listen to Daddy when he says, "Don't let them put carpet on the stairs! I'll refinish them since they are hardwood." Yeah, that didn't happen and I wasn't holding my breath after 5 years. Love you my precious hubby, but you are a bit behind on the DIY's:)!

Almost 5 years and many blog and Google searches later, I came across Rhoda's stair redo on The Lettered Cottage. Okay friends, now we are up to speed. I do love me some background so you can get the gist of everything...

So, I went to Lowe's and got some Crown NEXT Paint Strip environmentally friendly paint and varnish stripper (and installed myself a pole...ha ha) and got to work. Here's how my steps looked after the stripper (pole and all...ha ha)...

First, let me emphasize the importance of safety goggles. No, they don't particularly work when you have them on your head! Yes friends, I had them holding back my hair that was hanging in my eyes blocking my view of properly "STRIPPING" my stairs. As you can imagine, I flung some of the paint stripper in my eye and had to flush for 15 (3) minutes and throw away my brand new pair of disposable contacts. Oh, I was fine! It was just a little and I still have my eyesight 2 weeks later. So, I know, right, the stairs are still crappy, but my toenails look pretty in the picture! Daddy was still hanging on to the whole "I'll refinish them" thing. I'm thinking that would require a professional, which we are not! Sorry Daddy, you're a pro at a lot of stuff, but...

Next, I primed, and even the primer made me so happy! I also primed the wall/paneling around each riser and tread where there was no primer or paint due to it being painted before the old carpet was pulled up 5 years earlier. Oh, and did I mention that I did all of this when my two crazy kids were at the beach with my Mommy (shout out to Mommy who loves it when her 30-something daughter calls her Mommy - and she is the greatest Mommy in the world - overboard? maybe a little). Anyway, she took my kids away so I could ACTUALLY complete a project, so I gotta give her what she wants, my Mommy that is:)! And, drum roll please, here are my steps primed...

Lovely, right. Once the primer was dry, I set out with my Valspar Porch and Floor paint in "something" black (can't remember the exact name and the paint is downstairs and I'm not getting up to walk down there now even though I would like to see my pretty stairs, what with all this talk about them). Please note that I do tend to get paintbrush happy whenever I am holding one in my hands. I had the bright idea, which came back to haunt me later, that the parquet entry floor should be black too. I just tested it out a little. I'd love to show you, but it might ruin the finished product picture I have saved up. Let me just say that Daddy didn't like it. As a matter of fact, he said, "Why'd you paint the foyer floor?" As in, you crazy, paint brush-holding woman, step away from the paint can and put DOWN the brush! That brush happy mistake only took an HOUR to SCRAPE off.

So, after many (kidless) hours of working on my stairs, a little "stripper" in the eye, some scraping due to "brush-happy" hands, lots of primer and a little porch and floor paint from Lowe's, here is my finished product...

Oh, and I painted the end posts and railings too (told you I am brush happy), but left the spindles white. That small touch updated the entire area. I am telling you that my entry way is now a happy place to be! I also had a pedicure in the midst of all of this and picked out a fabulous purple called "Can You Dig It" by OPI.

Let me also mention that I found the cutest, most precious half round table that is perfect for my foyer, along with a great iron candle stick and a green cross as accessories at The French Flea. And here is a picture of that...

Thanks for stopping by to see my stair redo that was totally inspired by Southern Hospitality!

I still have some molding to add and some paint touch up to do and maybe a poly top coat to add that will help with the crazy kids scuffing it all up, but for now, I am in my happy place!

The Eiffel Tower and Lillian's

2010-08-09T22:58:00.004-05:00

Summer Rose (previous post) is sad, cause it's all officially coming to an end this week! No more sleeping late, no more staying up late, and the week of QUIET has officially ended. Yes, my precious Mama and Papa took my kids home with them last week and let me just tell you that they had a blast!!! They were at the beach for an entire week! What kid could ask for more? Of course, the wild woman came down with a horrible Strep Rash one day in and Mama had to find a pediatrician close to home who confirmed the illness. Then, Mama caught the same highly contagious rash, with a vengeance! Love you Mommy!!! Thank the Good Lord Beebs and Papa didn't get it. The rash didn't stop them from having a good time (sorry to those of you that went to see Toy Story 3 at the same time, went to the indoor pool at the same time, and the kids' fav restaurant at the same time). Nope, you can't stop Mama from having a good time...

On the day when Mama's rash was the worst, Papa took the girls to the Naval Museum, which they absolutely loved! Not sure if they loved the Naval Museum as much as they loved hanging with Papa for an entire day, but it was cool! After the Naval Museum, Papa took them to a real lighthouse. They climbed (seriously, lots of stairs) all the way to the top. They were about 10 steps from the top when they came across a little guy (Beebs says he was going into 1st grade, although I'm not sure how she knew that what with all the crying he was doing) he was freaking out about going back down the stairs. Papa secretly freaked out at this point, cause he thought this was going to make the girls freak out! When I asked them later if they got scared when they saw how scard the little boy was, Beebs said, "No, he just made my head hurt because he was soooooooooooo loud!" I'm telling you, only from the moufs of babes! Anyway, they called me that night to fill me in on the days events, and I got to talk to Annie first. Annie's gig on the phone is, "Mommy, I need to tell you sumfin." To which I always reply, "Okay, tell me."

This time, what she told me made me laugh out loud and almost fall on the floor! "Mommy, we climbed de Eiffel Tower today!"

"You did what? I didn't know Papa took you all the way to Paris!"

Then, I hear Mama in the background, "No, Annie, you went to a lighthouse." I guess in a four year old mind, a lighthouse with all its stairs is kind of like the Eiffel Tower. But, how in the world does she know what the Eiffel Tower is? It's gotta be a Disney Channel thing...

We finally, after the quietest week EVER, arrived to gather up the children and spend one night with my precious Mama and Papa before heading to our old stomping ground, which is my dad's beach place! We had a great time with Mama and Papa (aka, Mr. Old Fashioned, which is my blog shout out to Papa - "that's what I'm talkin about RIGHT THERE! - love you Pops). Anyway, we had a fun little family mini-vacay with the kids! We took them to eat at Lillian's Pizza, which is one of our all time fav's!!! It used to sit right on the beach, until one of the hurricanes knocked it OUT! Anyway, they rebuilt, but this time, across the street from the beach. Still great food (and wine), but across the street. As we were pulling in, Daddy was showing the girls where it used to be before the hurricane. To which Beebs promptly replied, "Did the hurricane move it across the street?" Ahhh, I'm telling you, only from the moufs of babes!

Again, see the previous post about the things that come out of my babes "moufs". It's truly the reason I write this blog! They crack me up daily!

So, to sum it up, Summer Rose is happy about the fun we had this summer and so happy that it ended on a happy note! This post is just a little reminder of how much fun we had with Mama and Papa. Thanks y'all! This one's for you two lovebirds and the best grandparents two (or seven) little ones could ever ask for!!!

The Napmat Fit

2010-07-21T20:33:00.005-05:00

Dear Daddy (and all other Daddies, husbands, brothers, future husbands...), I do understand your struggles with the gals in your life. We are only happy when things go our way. Why just today I told my good friend Dee that Daddy doesn't understand that my plan is the best plan, always, end of story. But, please try to understand the hormonal shifts that are ingrained within us. Why, we are born with all of the eggs that our ovaries will produce throughout our lifetime. We go through puberty and bleed from strange places. Some of us take hormones to help us have babies and then again when all of the period madness stops and the menopause starts. We carry babies in our bodies for 40 weeks and then GIVE BIRTH to them. GIVE BIRTH to them (I had to say that one more time, because we GIVE BIRTH to them as in birthing, you know, watermelon through a nostril, birth). Then we breast feed those precious angels and our boobs hang really low and sad. The only thing left to hold them up is the stretch marked belly that held that precious angel baby. Thank God for the belly! Anyway, Daddy's, husbands, brothers, future husbands..., here's a little story to help you through the madness of living with girls. And remember, we are VERY LOVING (especially when we get our way).

When our sweet precious Beebs was just a tiny tot, she had what we lovingly refer to now as a "napmat" fit. Let me fill you in...Beebs was 2 and moving into the nap room and out of a Pack and Play. Huge step for us all. So, I took her to Penney's and let her choose a napmat for day care. We picked a pretty pink one with hearts and diamonds on it. We brought it home and she proudly showed it off to Daddy. Then, as we put her to bed that night, and keep in mind that she was two and not really showing signs of The Terrible Twos yet, she had the mother of all fits...the NAPMAT fit! She sounded like Linda Blair in The Exorcist. "NAPMAT! I WANT MY NAPMAT!" She said it over and over and over and, well I'm sure you understand. It went on for a while and Daddy and I stood and stared at her then one another, then back at her, then back at each other with the look of "this child is possessed and what in the #@!& do we do with her!" I'm not really sure what happened after that, because sometimes a mother must block those fits from her mind. I'm sure we didn't give in though. I think we probably did what I did tonight and walked out closing the door behind us, because as this mommy likes to say, "no one wants to hear you acting like that". Except tonight, she's not 2, she's SEVEN AND A HALF and she wanted to stay up later than 8:30, except, she has been up until 10:30 or later for the past two weeks and she is worn out. So, she wasn't getting her way. Again, as the mommy in this case, my plan is always the best plan, end of story!

Anyway, I did what any good mother would do. I got the video camera. Of course the battery was dead, but she didn't know that. I opened the screen and acted as if I was filming her. I know what you're thinking, "Dang that's a good momma!", but wait...there's more. She flipped out when she realized I was "filming" her and begged me not to show it to anyone. To which I replied, "Oh, I'm just filming this to send in to Nanny 911."

"You can't let her come get me," she was really scared now (insert evil laugh here).

"Of course not, I'm just going to show her this video and see if she has any ideas on how to deal with napmat fits since you and Annie seem to have them ALOT lately!"

"You can't show that video to any of my friends!" Of course with the typing, the Linda Blair doesn't quite come through, so just play it out in your mind.

"Why, Beebs, are you ashamed of the way you are acting?"

"Yes and if my friends saw it, I would be so embarrassed!"

"Perhaps you should think about that before you have another napmat fit then."

Keep in mind, Annie and I were laughing the whole time. Annie just kept dying laughing, which made me laugh even harder. Now usually I would yell back, but I was extremely calm and Annie kept laughing. I really surprised myself.

I only wish that video camera would have worked so I could show her that video tomorrow. I'm going to charge it right now so I can video the next napmat fit. I think I'm onto something here!

Who threw away my wedding dress?

2010-07-16T10:40:00.006-05:00

I know I'm not alone in this, but my kids say (and do) the weirdest things! So, Annie and Beebs got their own "spongy things" (that's what I call them). You know those things you put liquid body wash on and bathe with, yeah those. Anyway, Annie immediately took to tearing hers apart and it's white. She usually takes to tearing things apart rather quickly. That's just her gig (previous post). Slowly, but surly, she has picked and picked and picked and picked some more until she finally freed it from the string that was holding it all together. She has lots of time for these activities, because we let her play in the tub for a few extra minutes, you know like hours on end. Hey, if she's in the tub, she's not cutting hair, taping multiple papers to the wall in the hallway, putting Chapstick on Hemmer, Bitty and the bathroom mirror, or drawing on the walls or herself with Sharpie (yes, she does all of the things and more - please see previous posts for detailed descriptions). But I digress and must get back to the matter at hand! I heard her calling for me from the tub last night, saying, "Moooooooommmmmmmmyyyyyy, I'm getting married." Now, this is not an odd statement from either of my kids. We've had numerous weddings in the living room and Annie talks about getting married all the time and how her husband is gone to work, but he will be back soon to pick up Bitty and Hemmer...you get the picture.

Anyway, she wanted me to come see her "Wedding Dress". "It's beautiful and white!" she said.

I slowly (praying that the bathtub was not full of toilet paper) made my way to the bathroom and peeked in to see the creation that was a beautiful and white wedding dress. Yes, my friends, it was the spongy thing all picked apart, but in one very long piece and wrapped around my bride to be. And, yes it was very beautiful even if a little gal made it out of a spongy thing. Maybe not an engineer, but a designer of all things strange and lovely.

I found the wedding dress laid out beautifully in her floor last night after she was asleep and decided to save myself the time of picking up pieces of it that had been cut to shreds by the High School Musical scissors and go ahead and throw it in the trash. HUGE mistake!!! This morning my little angel came running to me with tears streaming down her face asking, "Who threw away my wedding dress?"

Annie's swimmin' and diamond necklaces

2010-07-14T20:13:00.004-05:00

This is straight from the "mouf" of my Beebs...

"annie swam as good as a whale! her lifeguard was my swim teacher last year and my dad talked to a lifeguard and said, "annie needs to be moved to a different group, cause she's a way better swimmer than that." I laughed - ha ha - and I think that she is a good swimmer except at swim lessons, last year, with my coaches, his nickname was Crazy Corey!"

Thank you, my Beebs!

So, yesterday as I was getting dressed for work, I put on a necklace and earrings and, as usual, I checked with Beebs to make sure it looked okay with my outfit. Now, the necklace, which is total costume jewelry, has a big HUGE diamond (piece of cut glass), and Beebs replied, "Oh, Mommy, DIAMONDS go with everything!"

You gotta love the things that come out of the "moufs" of babes!

Directions for the Caesar Salad?

2010-07-13T21:15:00.003-05:00

No, this post is not about me making dinner! Ha, that would be hilarious. No, really, I do cook every once in a while, but only when I absolutely have to. Anyway, Daddy and I decided to have Grilled Chicken Caesar Salads for dinner last night. So, he headed out to the grocery to get the Romaine and shredded Parmesan Cheese. Well, I guess he figured out when he got to the store, that he wasn't sure if we had all the other ingredients. So, he called. Beebs answered (as usual) and came running in the kitchen questioning me.

"Hey Mommy, Daddy needs to know if we have DIRECTIONS for the Caesar Salad?"

"Huh?" I said.

She repeated (kind of like Uncle Lewis in Christmas Vacation - yes, I do love me some Chevy Chase - as he is holding is hands up to his mouth showing Aunt Bethany that they want her to say Grace, as in "the blessing"), "D I R E C T I O N S!", which she practically yelled at me like I was the idiot.

I calmly (ha ha) replied, "Directions for the Caesar Salad? I think Daddy knows how to make a Caesar Salad! Just give me the phone!"

All I hear on the other end of the line is Daddy dying laughing!!!

Apparently, Daddy needed to know if we had DRESSING for the Caesar Salad. Only from the "moufs" of babes...(that's from an older post and I think I might have to copyright it since I use it so much!

What's your gig?

2010-07-01T22:36:00.010-05:00

Definition of gig: noun, A job, especially a booking for musicians.

I LOVE THIS WORD!!!

I say it all the time. Really, that's just my gig. See, I just said it right there. I am not sure why I started using this word, but I do that. I'll use a word or phrase for a while and then retire it. Like "preaching to the choir", that was my gig for a while.

My gig right now is...well, of course, Summer Rose (see previous post). Summer Rose does love listening to the crickets while sitting on the deck drinking a nice cold beverage. My everyday gig is rambling on and on (as you might have noticed), but I make myself laugh, and that's all that counts, really, it is. My gig this week was not so much fun, what with my Josey Wales going to Heaven. Our gig on Saturday is the funeral for JoJo.

Beebs' gig tonight is a sleepover and wanting her sister to be as far away from her as possible, so thank the Good Lord that...

Annie's gig is "Annie's lights are out..." (see previous post and yes, we love it when the wild kid falls out) Praise the Good Lord!

Daddy's gig, as usual, is cooking me some good dinner! Tonight, it is I-talian (southern pronunciation) sausage with some yummy sauteed veggies!!! Daddy is the best cook and absolutely the BEST HUSBAND IN THE WORLD!

My 4th of July gig is making a flag cake (not as fancy as TDC's pink, aqua and white cake, click on my handy dandy Thrifty Decor Chick button to see her post about that cake, which is hilarious), but just a regular old cake (from the box, of course), with cool whip icing, strawberries and blueberries as the stars and stripes. I make it almost every 4th, so that must be my 4th gig!

Nahnie's gig (that's my sis) is listening to a band that's having a gig at a sweet little place downtown. She needs to go to bed!!!

Mama and Papa's gig is, hopefully, going to see the Jimmy Buffet tribute to the GULF concert in Gulf Shores.

Everyone's gig right now should be, SAVING THE GULF! The Good Lord knows that BP ain't doin' nothin' about it, so let's everybody go on vacation and clean up what we can while we're there!

So, what's your gig? Let me know...

(BTW, I love a "dot, dot, dot"...have you figured that out yet?)

The Outlaw, Josey Wales Chapman

2010-06-29T11:50:00.009-05:00

Dog is man's best friend, and woman's and child's! Our precious Josey Wales went to Heaven today. He was such a sweet boy! I am sitting here waiting for him to rub his slobbery mouth on my leg or almost demolish the deck by scratching his own belly. Yes, he was HUGE, but he was just a big 'ole baby. He was a Rottweiler Lab mix, he weighed 110 pounds, Daddy taught him to sit and I taught him to shake with one paw, then the other. He could have been on Letterman's "Stupid Pet Tricks", because he could hike his squeaky toy football through his legs, just like the center for the Auburn Tigers (or the other team if Daddy was telling this story). That is until he tore it to shreds like every other toy or collar or name tag we ever gave him. I think he might have actually swallowed the "indestructible" name tag I had etched for him stating that he was Josey Wales Chapman. We finally started giving him empty water bottles, because they were cheaper than buying new dog toys once a week. He could tear up a newspaper in a matter of seconds. He could tear up a dog bed in a matter of minutes. Literally, it took him 5 minutes to tear up the bed we bought for him in March. He could gnaw at his own leg or a Boston Butt bone for hours. He could dig a hole so deep that the dirt was cool and gave him a nice soft bed. He was a great "horse" first for Beebs, then for Annie to ride on! He was our first big dog and he made me feel safe. He barked at the gas meter reader from the time he heard his truck pull into our little town and wouldn't let up until he heard him leave our little town. Mr. Meter Reader always said, "We do this dance every month!" He carried a really big metal rod with him. I guess he was afraid of JoJo. Josey howled at the fire trucks every time they left the station with their sirens on. He even taught the neighbor dogs to howl at them too.

Our backyard will never be the same. The plants and trees I have planted will probably stay in tact, but the yard will probably be overrun by the possums and raccoons that he loyally chased away. The squirrels won't be afraid to come on the deck anymore (unless Daddy gets that bee bee gun he's been wanting).

Josey loved Daddy and me and Beebs and Annie and we all loved him so very dearly. I know dogs come and go more quickly than we do, but somehow, they settle right into your heart just like one of your children. I'm just happy that Daddy and I rescued him and gave him a home and a family that loved him for his 9 years on earth. Our family will have a little piece missing because he's not here with us anymore, but, all dogs do go to heaven...

The Maladies of "Nunya" and "The Tick"

2010-05-29T22:41:00.007-05:00

Well, I started this post a couple weeks ago and am just now adding the text! Helllllllo, Summer Self, wake up and get with the posts! Anyway, let me tell you about the maladies...

"Nunya": def.: what i tell my kids when they butt in on my conversations with Daddy. In other words, "It's NUNYA business!" Anyway, Annie had Nunya. I know sweet, sad, quiet (yeah, right, I'm quiet), somewhat depressed and definitely not tan, Winter Self did not tell you about Annie's Nunya. But, my baby had Pneumonia in February. It was very scary for all of us (me), first because it snowed on that Friday in our little town in Alabama. Now, if you haven't been in Alabama when it snows, let me fill you in. Everything SHUTS DOWN! So, it snowed, my mama had been here, Annie had been coughing a little and mama told her not to play in the snow or she'd catch Pneumonia. I am a firm believer in knocking on wood, which no one did at that particular moment in time, unfortunately. At 11 p.m. I ventured out in the "blizzard" to get some Tylenol to alternate with the Motrin that my precious neighbor gave me. Thanks K! So, point is, Annie had Pneumonia, which she affectionately has renamed "Nunya". It sounds the same and it was hilarious when she told me, after the tick incident, "Mommy, remember when I had Nunya and had to get a shot!?!" Furthermore, when we were leaving the wonderful Chuck E. Cheese the other night after A's 5th birthday party, we walked out with Mimi and Pawpaw H, A's grandparents. Mimi and Pawpaw live at the lake and we went to visit 2 summers ago. Pawpaw had taken care of Aunt Lele's pet bird Sunny since she moved out long time ago and Beebs fell in love with the bird. Well, as we were walking out with them, I was reminding Beebs of our visit and playing with Sunny. As she, in the sweetest 7 year old way, was remembering, Pawpaw said, "Yep, Sunny's dead. I left him downstairs all Winter and he got too cold, caught Pneumonia and died!". Beebs was horrified, but all Annie had to say (once again), was, "Hey Mommy, member when I had Nunya and had to get a shot?" Only from the moufs (again with my previous posts, you'll have to go back and read it if you haven't already!) of babes!

On to the Tick! Summer self sends Beebs to Day School with Annie, because I must tackle the commercial real estate world (I really don't tackle, just take care of 3rd child - previous post). There was one day where I had to ask our sweet Mrs. F and precious Baby M to bring them home. That was the day we were leaving to visit Granny in Kentucky, or just plain ole "Tucky" as Annie calls it (could be worse). Anyway, Mrs. F made sure to tell Daddy that she had checked them for ticks because some of the Day School kiddos had them after being on the playground. Daddy failed to mention this to me and you know what happened...guess...Beebs found the tick on her own head. Now that was not immediately after F told Daddy to check, noooooo, it was 2 days later, while we were at Granny's (Daddy's mama), at around 11 p.m. as they were STRUGGLING to go to sleep. So, we carried Mr. Tick all the way from our little town, over the river and through the woods, to Granny's house. And, we played with cousins with Mr. Tick, and we had meals with Mr. Tick and we swam in Granny's pool with Mr. Tick. Anyway, in true Beebs fashion (she's a little bit like her mama, God love her), she was taking down her ponytail, rubbing the back of her head and then, screaming bloody murder. Well, Daddy in his infinite talk radio wisdom, told us that he needed baby oil STAT, which Granny promptly returned with. I didn't even know they made baby oil anymore. We used to use it for "sunscreen". Daddy had heard a doctor on the radio talking about ticks and using baby oil to make them back out of the skin they were attached to. (My skin is crawling just typing this.) After several douses with the baby oil and several very long minutes of freaking out (Beebs and me), and several suggestions (by me) of using the tweezers, Daddy finally caved on the baby oil gig and asked for the tweezers. Yes, I am the expert on tick removal as I had to pull one out of Aunt D's ear on our way to the beach in, oh, about '97 or '98 and let me tell you that the tweezers saved us. That story is what calmed Beebs after the tick had been flushed! But, Aunt D's tick is another story for another post.

Thank you Mommy (patting myself on the back), for taking care of me through the Nunya, for always being the expert on all things tweezers and tick removal, for finding my DS charger, for having Sponge Bob Band-aids when we have pool toe, for letting us watch Sweet 16 on Disney, for making us separate dinners so we can each have what we want, for helping me clean my room, for letting me eat the ice cream I just fixed for myself, and most of all, for letting us sit in the way back of your car! Mommy, you rock, and your tan is awesome!!!

Did I go a little overboard? Sometimes somebody's gotta pat ya on the back, even if it is yourself...

"Annie's lights are out...", said my precious Beebs

2010-05-20T22:20:00.005-05:00

"Mommy, Annie's lights are out!" Only from the moufs (see earlier post) of Beebs (no, not babes, but Beebs). Annie, after a small (in Annie's grand scheme of things) fit over me making her take off her panties so she wouldn't poop in them (again, earlier post), a large dinner of fish sticks, fries and black beans and corn (and no, Annie didn't "crap" corn - sort of our little take on "Jimmy cracked corn"), and an even larger bath full of Barbie's and whatever else they can find to put in the tub, Annie decided a little "America's Funniest Videos" was in order for her in Mommy and Daddy's big bed. While Beebs and I did a small craft for a teacher gift (please see the picture below - very impressed with ourselves!), Annie laid up in the king size to watch a little AFV. After some time, Daddy asked, "Hey, where is Annie?" Yes, we do a fantastic parenting job! Who knows, she could have been next door! Anyway, I mentioned to Daddy her plan that involved the king size and AFV and we all decided that she was either a. engrossed in TV, or 2. (Fletch reference) "out like a light". Now, out like a light is our little term for "Thank the Good Lord this child is asleep!" When Annie is asleep, we know that nothing (body parts, walls, sometimes - rarely - paper) is being written on with a black Sharpie, no fingers are getting stuck in syrup bottles, no arms are getting stuck in the handle to the oven door, no heads and shoulders are getting stuck in the Dora potty seat, and best of all, NO HAIR IS GETTING CUT!

So, Beebs and I finished our craft/teacher gift and she looked at me and said (spoken like a true 7 year old), "I am SO not going to check on Annie!"

To which I replied (spoken like a true, um, well 7 year old), "I SO don't expect you to!"

She disappeared down the hall to put her teacher gift in her backpack. A few minutes later she returned to inform me, "Annie's lights are OUT!"

I said, "Don't you mean she's out like a light?"

"No, Mommy," she replied, "her eyes are closed, her brain is sleeping, that means her lights are out!" Ahhh, the logic! And then she ran off to watch another Justin Bieber video on YouTube.

I just thank the Good Lord that Beebs didn't knock her lights out. It could happen...

Now, tell me what you think about our teacher gift. In case you can't tell from the small picture, they are note cards with animals, bugs and shapes made out of the little angels fingerprints. Daddy thinks we should make a bunch and sell them on eBay. It could happen...but, would you buy them?

Oooo y'all I do love a day at home by myself...

2010-05-14T20:44:00.006-05:00

So, I worked from home today until (about 10 minutes ago) about 11:00 a.m. In between taking care of my 3rd child (I'm an Executive Assistant to the same man for 15 years, so yes, I can call him my 3rd child, 4th if you count Daddy), I managed to mop the hideous kitchen floor (another story for another day), which is already destroyed again and do 1 load of laundry, which I haven't folded yet...Anyway, I was at home by myself. I know you are saying, "How, how in the world did you manage to be at home by yourself? I have seen all the complaining you do about your jobs and volunteering," (again, need to have a happy heart!). Thank you for your concern, but, I managed. I texted 3rd child (or 4th, however you want to look at it) at 10:30 last night when we were wrapping up our day and politely asked (begged) him if he minded me working from home since he was travelling. Third (or 4th) child graciously offered me that small sacrifice. I do love my 3rd (or 4th) child!

Anyway, after 11 a.m. (and walking the Beebs to school, which made both of us very happy:), I got a wild hair and decided to paint my blue table. Now, I bought that blue table from neighbor Nini's (that's her grandma name, but she is soooooo not grandma"ish") garage sale about a year ago and it fits perfectly for the spot I chose. I loved the turquoise color of it and that's why I bought it from Nini. Still do. It was the color of our dining and living room in our first (very tiny) house. But...it needed some freshening and since I like to reuse the leftover paint that we have in the garage, I painted it Homestead Resort Moss. Yes, that is the color of my bathroom and the little (in very bad shape) antique table that I got from Daddy's grandparents house (told you I reuse paint). I still have half a gallon left, so who knows what else will be painted Homestead Resort Moss. Anyway, the messy blue was killing me because I couldn't (no matter what I did) fix the stains, etc. I do love all things weathered, but this was just TOO much for me to deal with. So, (drum roll) there it is. Still in it's blue form. Please excuse the garage:). The top is already painted green in this picture, but apparently, my fantastic photography skills did not capture that. Tomorrow, I will finish it and show you the beauty that it is in my next post!

The other thing I got into (my wheels were turning as Daddy would say), is painting Aunt Sunny's birdcage. It was green, and now it is a beautiful baby blue with two beautiful baby girls holding it. Oh yeah, they have beautiful baby blue eyes (just like their Daddy)! Again with the drum roll, here it is with the beautiful blue eyed Beebs and Annie holding it...

Oh my, I can't wait to hang it in it's perfect little corner in the den. More to come...

Summer Rose, Summer Rose the 2nd and Summer Rose the 3rd

2010-05-11T13:58:00.004-05:00

My old friend is returning from the frozen tundra of wintertime. And here she is, summer self! I knew I should have named one of my kids Summer Rose! Perhaps I'll change my name to Summer Rose! Seriously, the winter time was depressing! Nothing made me feel better! I have been sweating here in Alabamy now for a good two weeks. That is, up until yesterday when it was 56 degrees. I'm sorry, but once it's been 89, there is no turning back for me! School is almost over. Dance is almost over. The other VARIOUS things I have volunteered for (and bitched about, which doesn't make a true volunteer because I wasn't giving of my time unselfishly and next Fall remind me not to spread my time so thin) are almost over. And, the neighborhood pool opens next weekend. Friend Susie has her pool open, and oh yes, Summer Rose the 2nd and Summer Rose the 3rd have both been in Susie's pool!

Annie (aka for this summer, Summer Rose the 3rd) is making huge strides in going to the potty. I know you that know her are thinking, "She is 4 and 1/2 years old!" Don't judge me, she's spoiled rotten and lazy. Basically, she should have been a boy and may be just like her Daddy! I don't know what else to do, but I am making huge strides! She has made it through the night dry for the past three weeks only because I took a stand against the racket that is what you and Target may call Pull-Ups. "I'm a big kid now" my thumb! Anyway, Annie is moving up to the 4K class, so we have another year to make sure she is good and trained before she goes to Kindergarten. Also, that means that I only have one more year of doing the Day Care's books in exchange for free Day Care. Free Day Care, my thumb!

Beebs has made it through 1st Grade like a champ. There were some times I wasn't so sure about her, but the last spelling test proved me wrong. 11/10 and 100% on sentence structure. You can't ask for more than that (although, I would if I knew how). I want her to make all A's. Don't we always want better for our kids! She only had one boyfriend this year, because I told her it wasn't allowed! Get this though, when he asked her to be his girlfriend, she said, and I quote, "I don't know, I'll have to ask my mom." How awesome is she!?! I ran through all of the questions, like why would you want to be his girlfriend and why do you like him. Her resounding answer was, "Because he's my friend." What more can you ask of a precious 7 year old!?!

Daddy's (our) A&E Landscaping & Lawn Care is taking off! We have a couple of new clients this year, so we are slowly building it up. I found a great deal (at www.Vistaprint.com) on everything marketing. We have car door magnets, yard signs and business cards as well as our very own logo! More on that later. Maybe I can even upload our logo to my blog. What a concept!

I am planning minor home redos, not renovations, but redos. Renovations take too much time and should be saved for the winter. Thanks to my new friend "The Lettered Cottage", my first project is to paint my steps that were covered in carpet. You see, when we moved into our house 5 years ago, we had the carpet replaced. Daddy told the carpet layers not to put carpet on the stairs because he was going to refinish those. Yep, they're still in the same sorry state. And, it wouldn't be so bad, but ours is a split foyer home, i.e. the first thing you see when you come in. So, I'm going to paint those according to the step by steps I found (no pun intended), re-paint the entire downstairs: den, entryway, bathroom, bedroom and all ceilings. Grandmama and Daddy are going to be contracted to help and Lord only knows what we'll do with the children! I promise to add before and after pics. I think I finally figured it out...

So, here I am, back in your good graces, with my bathing suit in one hand and my Corona Light in the other! Life could not get any better than life with Summer Rose...

Family, The Holler and Christmas (Self)

2009-12-19T22:25:00.006-06:00

Well, Christmas self is a happy girl! I love to bake and what better time of year to bake than Christmas! Of course, I haven't had time yet, but I think all major committments are complete now and I can focus on time at home, time to bake and time with my precious girls and precious hubby! Okay, so precious is not the greatest word to describe two kids and one husband (and one crazy mommy) all couped up in the house at Christmas, because 1. "baby, it's cold outside" and 2. I really miss Summer self:)! I thought of her today as I was sipping (okay gulping) my ice cold Corona Light, readying myself for another set of family visitors and staring into the eyes of Ro, Jo, We, Beebs and Annie in a picture by the pool in their bathing suits eating homemade ice cream. It was kind of like that scene in Christmas Vacation when Clark is looking out the kitchen window envisioning the pool he is going to put in as soon as the ground thaws out.

Anyway, we have already had several Family Christmas celebrations and it's only December 19th. Every year on the second Saturday of December, since my Bigmama died, we have the Johnson Family Christmas! My Bigmama was my mama's mama and my mama is the youngest of 13. It used to be a whole lot of relatives in a small space, but some of them don't come anymore. Even despite the efforts of my JenJen who sent an FB message to every family member she had FB friended asking them to be there. If you are reading this and you didn't come, you should be terribly ashamed you bunch of heithens! My Bigmama would have wanted you to be there and I am sure that she smiles down on us from Heaven, not only every single day of the year, but especially on the second Saturday of December. You know who you are, heithens.

All of this brings me to the Holler. The Holler is acutally Johnson's Holler (Hollow to those of you who don't call it Holler, but it is Holler), where all thirteen grew up. William, Ceil, James, Elton, Opal, Arthur Bird, Hurbert, Wilma, Bobby Joe, Judy, Jean, Neil and Linda, all thirteen. Well, the DOT in Tennessee decided that it would be a good idea to run a portion of the interstate right straight through the Holler. It brought tears to my eyes! I couldn't even find the turn to my Bigmama's house. But, as Daddy says, that's progress. Has he no sentiment, I ask you? Then, we drove on around to Thompson Station Road, where my Granny's house was and still is, but she is in Heaven, and yes, she smiles down on me every day too. I just told my MIL today that I know that my Granny, my Bigmama and Daddy's Granny have a party in Heaven every day and are always smiling down on us. Anyway, TS Road is a wreck! There is a bridge going right over the hill and fields of the Fry's (Gangy said it was the Fry's) and directly across TS Road about 3/4 of a mile from Bill's Repair Shop. Bill's my Grandaddy and he had himself a car shop at the front of their property. It was great! It smelled like car grease, there were always a bunch of old men in there hanging out talking, and there was an old fridge in the back with cheese and pb cracker, a huge box of the BIG Super Bubble Bubble Gum and RC Cola. I loved that fridge! And, as a side note and something that makes my Beebs really really happy, Granny's house ain't far from Hannah Montana's house! Well, Gangy told me that my Grandaddy said that "they ain't gonna build that interstate in my lifetime!", and he was right! But it sure is there now! Even though I hate the song, it reminds me of "they paved paradise and put up a parking lot". I hate that song!

So, we have had several Christmas parties, family and otherwise, my church choir program, the girls' church choir program (Beebs was the Christmas Dove and Annie a Star Angel), Annie's school program (again an angel - do you see a pattern forming? - they don't see her at home:)), Beebs' school program, family Christmas with Ev's mama and his brothers fam. They have the sweetest kids, 13, 7 and 5! PRECIOUS kids and we got some really good pictures! We had our annual "Girls Christmas Lunch" at work, even though there are fewere of us this year (thank you Obama!) and we do Dirty Santa, where I got a fabulous necklace! Thanks LeLe! And Deb got my gift, which was also fabulous and I wanted to steal it from her for myself, but, it's a little tacky to steal your own gift. I guess, maybe not if you like it as much as I liked the cast iron reindeer!

Beebs and Annie can't wait for Santa. Hope they make it off the naughty list, ha ha! You know they are precious and are always on the nice list. Beebs, not so much tonight. How do you teach a kid to share when she is really just like you and doesn't want to let go of anything!?! God bless her, she is just like her mama, but I got it honest too (Grandmama)! Oh, and you know how a Nutcracker has long hair? Not so much anymore! Annie decided ours needed a crew cut! He looks AWESOME! Yeah, really:)! Beebs and Annie had their dance Christmas party today and Beebs' class was chosen to dance. She truly "rocked around the Christmas tree"!

Okay, so, Christmas self, while daydreaming about her former skinny(ish), salad eating, Corona Light drinking, air conditioner running, shower to shower under the boobs using, laundry souring, morning with Susie and Toby walking, with the girls pooling, tv on the deck watching self, is going to bake this week and get ready for Santa by watching a little Polar Express and definitely a lot of Clark Griswald! Merry Christmas to all and to all a goodnight! God bless America (thank you Aunt Bethany)...

Hello Summer Self, I miss you! When will you be back?

2009-10-29T21:28:00.004-05:00

Ahhh, the glorious days of Summer are gone and Fall (along with Fall self) are here. Lord help Fall self! I just realized today that she is way, way too busy. She might have over committed herself, maybe, just a hair. But, she's pushing through, barely. Fall self is sleepy and allergy ridden and has been to more birthday parties than you can shake a stick at. She hasn't been sitting by the pool with a nice cold Corona Light while watching the Beebs and Annie swim. Fall self really, really misses Summer self. Fall also means my birthday and yes, I turned 39. It was not an easy number for me. Summer self probably would have been fine, but where was she on that day? Oh yeah, she was still by the pool or on the beach in some nice tropical climate. God, I miss her!

On to the 2 reasons why I started this blog!

Annie turns 4 next week! She is so excited about her birthday party! So excited that she painted the bathroom with purple nail polish last Friday. Too bad it wasn't red. Then I could've thrown in a Dolly Parton quote from Steel Magnolias about painting her front door (bathroom) red and changing her name to Elizabeth Arden. But, it was purple, with a little green thrown in. I found the green behind the toilet tonight as I was scrubbing the toilet. We are taking her to Disney on Ice for her birthday and she is stoked!

Beebs is in full swing in 1st grade with lots of homework to boot. At least it seems like alot to sweet Summer self:)! She has a lively class and a sweet teacher. I think the "lively" class might just force our sweet young teacher to retire early. I, in Fall self mode, decided that it would be a good idea to be the co-room mom, what with all time I have on my hands and all...okay, I'm complaining again and don't mean to about co-room mom, because my heart is in it and after all, I only have to worry about the "Celebrations" and not the Field Trips! Thanks Jodi! I doubt if Jodi reads this, but just in case, thanks and G is precious! Beebs has a spelling test every Friday and has made an 11/10 on all but one or two. So proud!!! However, she does not like the homework! I took Beebs to see Miley Cyrus last Friday night. Still need to figure out how to post pics in this thing because I got a shot of her right as Miley came out and the look on her face was one of amazement. Miley was not Hannah, no, not at all! She was straight up Miley. I'm thinking the ropes that dropped during the "construction zone" scene could have been a sub for the stripper pole on the Teen Choice awards, but still, Beebs thought is was awesome and I haven't seen her doing the "stripper pole" dance, so all is good! Also, Miley's Daddy's house is literally around the corner from my Granny's house, so I know she is a good girl!

One more exciting event for my Beebs happened two weeks ago. So, when she was about 2 and learning to say her name (which is very long), it always came out Bebae. Well, I shortened it to Beebs and her Daddy loved that because that is also (or was) Gene Stallings nickname. Well, old Bebes (he spells his different) was in town doing a book signing and Daddy took her to meet him! She was SILENT (wish I could've witnessed that!). She was so excited, she couldn't speak. He told Daddy and Beebs how he got the nickname Bebes and Daddy told him how our Beebs got her nickname. I do love Gene Stallings, but I am an Auburn girl through and through. I mean, Weagle Weagle War Damn Eagle Kick 'Em in the Butt Big Blue!

Halloween is right around the corner and we have a scary witch with black hair and green face and a "Mermaid" Ariel with red hair to look forward to. Not the wedding dress Ariel (which we already owned), or the princess dress Ariel (which we already owned), no the mermaid Ariel (which we had to purchase). I'm tellin' ya, when a 3 year old gets her mind set on something, there is no changing it. That goes for a 6 year old too! Man, they are just like their mama.

Church is in full swing, and Jesus makes everything better, especially when I pray for patience on the way to work and when I get there my email Bible study title is "Be Gentle". Yes, the good Lord speaks directly to me.

Hopefully, Fall self will calm down soon and get back to "HER" thing: blogging and looking forward to finding her Summer self again! I know my sweet friend Susie is looking for Summer Susie too because we are Summer Self's together (a little shout to you sweet friend - love you!)

Happy Halloween y'all!

What? What happened? Where am I?

2009-09-24T21:22:00.004-05:00

I think I got lost. I haven't posted in so long I almost forgot what to do. Here are a few isms from the Chapman's...all of us this time!

Earshopping: that's what Beebs was not doing when I was watching The Other Boleyn Girl. "Mommy, I'm not earshopping!" Get it? Eavesdropping.

With liberty and justice for all: The new end to Annie's version of The Lord's Prayer. Yes, she is learning the Pledge of Allegiance in 3K.

Cough, cough, cough: What Mommy has been doing for the last week and 1/2 since I started a cold, got the flu shot and went down REALLY quick! Note to self and you, don't get the flu shot when you think you might be getting sick, because it WILL kick your butt!

A vinegar bath, what?: Yeah, Daddy worked in the lime plant for the last two days and rinsed off with vinegar in the garage. Only a man would rinse with vinegar inside the house!

Rest In Jesus

2009-08-28T10:51:00.001-05:00

Rest In Jesus

I have been looking for a daily Bible study so I can see, read and hear God's word daily in my life. I Googled "daily Bible study" and this is the first thing that popped up! This is exactly what I needed today!

Harry and Loomis Fargo

2009-08-22T22:02:00.007-05:00

Well, today was filled with too much fun! We had two, yes two, birthday parties in one day. Thank God for 5 year old Sam's birthday party at Jump Zone because both of our girls were asleep by 8:00 pm on a Saturday night. This is usually the night they beg us to stay up late since there is no school, except for Sunday School, the next day and we usually let them, because we'd rather talk to each other on our lovely deck while sipping a cold one than listen to the bitching. I've told you before that I am not one for the bitching! But today, in spite of the birthday fun, Beebs got 3 strikes (and she was out! of TV watching, that is) and both of them were worn out. You gotta love a huge indoor slide for an hour and a half!

I'll get to Loomis Fargo after I tell you about Harry. Our precious little elementary school (that Daddy went to for 1st and 2nd grade), which is about 3 or 4 blocks from our house and which we love wildly, has a new rule, with sign posted and all, that is very adamant about not dropping your kids off in the back of the school. We dropped off in the back of the school last year, even though it was discouraged, but the sign wasn't posted last year. Now there is a sign! "Loading and Unloading of Buses ONLY!" We are following the rules, because as Daddy says, "How can you expect your kids to follow the rules if you don't?!?!?" So, Daddy has opted for walking Beebs to school. Hooray for them. A little one on one for Daddy and Beebs is always a good thing. So Thursday, they were walking to school and a big gold Silverado blew past them. Daddy tells Beebs, "There goes Harry." (Harry was dropping off his kid in the back of the school.) Beebs said, "Daddy, why is his name Harry? Is he really hairy?" Apparently she had never heard this name before and it struck as very very funny. She decided that day that when she has kids and one of them is a boy, she is going to name him Harry! Hopefully he won't break the rules and drop off at the back of the school to avoid carpool!

On to Loomis Fargo. We went to Lowe's today after the Jump Zone (again, thank you Lord for whoever invented Jump Zone because Annie was asleep in the 2 minutes it took to get to Lowe's). When we pulled in to park, the Loomis Fargo truck was there delivering $$$. Annie said, "Hey dere's de money truck Daddy told us about." Oh the excitement in two little toeheaded girls eyes to see the money truck (and Mommy's eyes were quite happy too!). So they went on, "Daddy says there's a guy in the back with a gun and if you try to break in and steal the money then he'll shoot you!" By this time the truck was driving by and I, standing with the toeheaded angels said, "Wave to the nice money man." We all waved and he waved back. As he was passing, I pointed out the rectangular window in the side of the truck with the small square window underneath it saying, "That small window is where the man in the back points the gun out to shoot you if you're trying to steal the money." Mouths gaping, they were still waving and he was waving back. Not his gun, of course, just a nice friendly Loomis Fargo wave. It reminded me of the Gatlin gun in 3:10 to Yuma (not my favorite movie, but that part stuck with me).

Only from the minds and "moufs" of children!

2009-08-16T21:13:00.007-05:00

We are really on Jesus these days. What with the "Jesus wants you to share", "I no like Jesus", "Sissy, Jesus wants you share with me"... Our church routine is back in full swing (I know it shouldn't have slowed over the summer!). Anyway, Beebs asked me this afternoon what Jesus' last name is. Well, it's Christ, right? "Then, what is his middle name?", she wondered. Um, I replied, "Well, Jesus is God's son and I think they really just have one name each, except for the Holy Spirit." Which could have opened a whole new can of worms, but she decided, "Maybe I should just ask Mr. Pat (our pastor)." What a great idea! Ask Mr. Pat, he will know the answer!" How in the world do kids come up with some of the questions they ask?!?!

On to tornadoes. While getting ready for church this morning, Daddy and the girls were watching The Weather Channel to do a little research on the hurricanes that are forming. You know, Ana (big shocker), Bill and Claudette. You know they named the "A" hurricane after our precious little angel! Anyway, Daddy is reciting the hurricane forecast to me and all the girls hear is BAD WEATHER. Now, I know I haven't mentioned this before (or maybe I have), but part of our nightly routine before bedtime is a list of questions. A couple of the questions were contributed by our neighbor, Little N from The Solomon Story blog. Here goes and keep in mind that this is like a racquetball game, Beebs and Annie throwing out the questions and Daddy and I bouncing back the answers!

"No tornadoes tonight?"
"No!"
"No storms?"
"No!"
"No wind?"
"No rain?" (I think there is a song forming.)
"No mean cats?" (The mean cat across the street tries to terrorize June Kitty Cash, or the Killer as we like to call her. See "Mommy I found a Possum" post.)
"No witches?" (Too much Scooby Doo!)
"No falling off the swing?" (Little N)
"No falling off the seesaw?" (A new take on Little N's nightly questions.)
"No falling off the slide?" (Again, a new take on Little N.)
By this time, they are giggling, because they know we don't have a swing set with a slide, swing or seesaw! It's just a little parent torture.

But, I digress. Back to the hurricane forecast. (The previous questions do relate to how this conversation started, though.) So, Daddy is giving me the hurricane forecast and Beebs says, "Daddy, there is going to be a tornado?!?!?", using all the Drama Queen she can muster, which doesn't take much! Daddy replies, "Tornado did not come out of my mouth!" And Annie says, "Daddy, tornadoes don't come out of our moufs, do dey?" "No, Annie, tornadoes don't come out of our mouths!", Daddy replies while picking himself up off the floor!

Only from the minds and "moufs" of children!

Brownies and Jesus

2009-08-15T22:24:00.003-05:00

Our Beebs had her bridging up ceremony today from Daisy Scouts to Brownies and if I ever figure out how to put pictures up, I'll post one. So, now she's a Brownie! Hooray! It was so sweet with the story of why they are called Brownie's by our Troop Leader. Beebs even looked for her reflection, like in the story, in a puddle on the sidewalk. So, she was listening.

Annie, well, I think she is loving Jesus now. I heard her telling Beebs a couple of days ago that "Jesus really wants you to share with me!" She might not have gotten the gist of what I was saying, but she sure did use it on Beebs!

They hear more than we think they do!

And, oh the joy of the school bell ringing. Life is back to routine and both angels were asleep by at least 8:30 every night this week. Good Lord, I love a routine!

"I no like Jesus, Mommy" and big tutu's

2009-08-05T21:46:00.012-05:00

How funny is my Annie! She had a fit tonight (a napmat fit as we call it) over not getting the Princess plate and instead getting the yellow plate. So, really, how funny is a 3 year old! Why is it so important which plate you get? Beebs doesn't really care, but she never gets to pick, so tonight Daddy let her pick. In the middle of the napmat fit, I sat down on Annie's bed and held her in my lap to explain to her the concept of sharing with Sissy. I said, "Sissy never gets to pick because you always get to pick which plate you want." You know, good parenting. I don't find myself good parenting alot because I'd rather not hear the bitching! As the napmat fit went on, I pulled out my Jesus card. "You know Annie, Jesus wants us to share, that's what the Bible is trying to teach us." To which Annie replied, "I no like Jesus!"

"But Jesus loves you!" I went on.

"I no like Jesus." Annie couldn't stop herself.

At that point, I had to stop and laugh. I looked to my right, because that always seems to be where Jesus is sitting in my world, and said to him, "You know that's funny!"

He was dying laughing! You know the three of them think we are hilarious!

On to Beebs. Her 1st grade teacher called me yesterday before the class lists are even posted because she wants to do reading assessments before school starts. The Teach is so sweet! God help her because Beebs' BFF, EG, is in the same 1st grade class and her "boyfriend" from her Kindergarten class is in there too. Anyway, Teach told me that Beebs and EG "will be sitting on opposite sides of the room". EG's mom had already talked to Teach and given her the rundown of the BFF situation. Kindergarten boyfriend is the precious angel that had to break up with Beebs because he wanted the girl with the "big tutu" to be his new girlfriend. Let me explain. Beebs takes dance from Kindergarten boyfriend's mom. We walk to dance alot because it's only minutes from our house. One dance day last year, Beebs and I were walking to dance. Actually, I was carrying her on my back. But, she began to tell me the story of how K boyfriend broke up with her. I asked her why and she replied, "he likes the girl at dance with the big tutu." Well, I was mortified, because we call our privates a tutu. I said, "Beebs, why are you and K boyfriend talking about tutu's?" She said, "I know Mommy, how does K boyfriend know what a tutu is? I guess it's because of his sisters." We immediately (with Beebs on my back and running) arrived at the dance studio so I could tell K B's mom what Beebs had just told me. And, she too was mortified because I mentioned how we call the privates tutus...

A few days later K B's mom figured it out. Our friend, Slick, has a daughter who is in K B's sisters' dance class, and her Grandmama had made her a new BALLET TUTU for Christmas and that is what K B was talking about. Imagine my surprise! Beebs had just introduced K B to tutus, and not the ballet kind! Luckily, he didn't know that Beebs knew something else could be called a tutu and he was only thinking of ballet. Thank God his mother is a dance teacher!

So, for a wrap up of the beginning of the week, my kids are the luckiest girls in the world! They have the best Daddy, which is something I am not sure I've ever experienced. They have gone fishing and swimming in the lake at the state park. Yuck! They have dusted my entire house, because Daddy made them do it! Thanks Daddy! Although, there is Pledge all over the floor because they really really like to spray. We have to be really careful to not rush over the hardwoods for fear that we might bust it. And today, they have wrestled with Daddy, fished at the neighborhood lake and gone to the pool with Mommy and Daddy. Luckily, we got there 10 minutes before courtesy break and Daddy and I actually were able to swim by ourselves during courtesy break. Oh the fun of watching your kids walk (no running at the pool) around the pool deck to sit on the side close to where you are (you know, the permanently up your butt thing) and then move really quickly away! We love to mess with our kids! I think that is Daddy and my favorite passtime!

We are movin' and shakin'

2009-08-04T09:45:00.007-05:00

Man, we have been all over the place. As my friend over at the Psych Ward said, I have taken a blogging holiday, or a blogiday! My Beebs went to golf and tennis camp week before last, which she loved. The whole week she was there, she would call and ask when Daddy and I were coming because she was at my Mom's (they live in a golf community at the beach, poor them!). Anyway, we finally get there after not seeing our precious almost 7 year old and she blows us off because she is standing with all of her new friends from camp. I mean REALLY? Can you already act like that at 7? She and Annie had talked on the phone every day and Annie wandered around aimlessly without someone to play with. You know, sometimes that second kid will push you right over the edge of the cliff, what with the fighting and biting and book throwing and, well surely you get the picture, but I am so glad they have each other! By the way, the fighting, biting and book throwing all started about 20 minutes into their long awaited reunion!

My friend over at Beauty and the Bates asked me yesterday why I hadn't posted my pictures from the beach yet. Well, of course, we left the camera at home. It's really hard to get out of our house! I think there is some kind of vaccum effect that literally won't let us leave and if we do, it sucks back in some of the most important things we need to take with us. Luckily, Hemmer made it to the beach with us buckled in all nice and snug right next to Annie!

That has been the last week and a half of my life. That and the counting down of days until school starts back. My house literally looks like a train wreck! I think that lima bean is still in my hall floor. I still haven't finished the project of painting my armoire, but Daddy insisted that we go ahead and move it back into the bedroom with out the doors on and without any drawer pulls. No, we cannot get the drawers open! I already have two, make that ten, new projects planned. My goal last week was to clean out the pantry because my cook (Daddy) put a bag of potatos in the top part and they rotted. When I picked up the bag, something disgusting was dripping out of the bag. Now see, that is why I don't cook. I left Daddy home with the girls today with specific instructions to clean up the downstairs, which has a couple of blanket tents that have been there for about five days, some wet bathing suits laying on the carpet, no telling how many juice cups... You get the picture, it's time for school to start back and get these people out of my house!

Since I am rambling, I will sign off, right after a couple of the latest Annieisms and my favorite Beebs quote of the week.

"Why God makes your poo poo come out?" (at least she did it on the potty)

"Mommy, these are my tattoos!" (at least it was ball point pen and not Sharpie, this time)

"Daddy, I don't think I want to go fishing again today. Can you just take us to the pool?" (that's my Beebs, boo fishing, yea chlorine!)

I love a good sale!

2009-07-20T15:34:00.003-05:00

Friday afternoon I thought it would be lots of fun to take Beebs and Annie to the mall...ride the carousel, a promise of a $5 or less prize from the Disney store, and some type of food treat. That all goes back to one of the questions from the Chapman castle, and yes, I am the crazy person that gave her children too much sugar on Friday afternoon, which is probably the reason I was "flusterated", a Beebs word, when we left the mall. That and the fact that I tried on bathing suits, because I am so tired of wearing the same one day after day to the pool, beach, grocery store, Lowe's. I always wear a cover up at the store. Anyway, I found two suits at Macy's after trying on maybe 1200! I now have buyer's remorse because the 25% sale on the suits at Macy's still made them about $75. I wore one and I love it and wouldn't trade it! The other one, not so much. I decided before I even left the store that I shouldn't have bought it and I am taking it back today. Yesterday I was talking to my friend, Roaming the Halls, and she told me to look at one of her fav websites for a swim suit, because she had gotten one there. It reminded me that I had found several that I liked earlier in the summer at Newport News, but I never pay full price, so I was waiting for them to go on sale. Then, RTH says, "Beauty and the Bates taught me to always look for a coupon code when buying something online!" That Ashley, she's a bargain hunter. Anyway, I found my few bathing suits (can't tell ya how many, b/c Daddy might read this), used my 20% off coupon code which saved me $18.60 and my free shipping code which still cost me $15 b/c I had to have them express shipped, and paid the same amount for my FEW bathing suits as I paid for one at Macy's. I was so happy with myself that I might just have to tell Daddy about that one! On second thought, "Oh honey, I've had these!" Thanks mom for teaching me right!

Moral of the story, buy online because you won't get "flusterated" at the mall and you can find huge savings! I love a good sale!!!

Questions from the Castle

2009-07-17T20:47:00.005-05:00

Well, as I have told you before, strange things happen in our little castle. Here are some questions to ponder from my week...

There are most likely only two answers, Beebs or Annie. See how many you can get right!

Why is there a lima bean in my hall floor?

Why did someone pee on the pool deck during swim lessons tonight?

Who is awesome and passed her swim test this week?

Who has gone off the diving board at least 4000 times after passing her swim test?

Who thinks that hot pink shorts with black lightning bolts on them match a light blue shirt with a kitty on it and actually wore it to school?

Who had to have the shampoo rinsed out of her hair with the kitchen sink sprayer after lotion was applied and pajamas put on because she didn't rinse her hair after washing it? Picture that one...Daddy holding her horizontally over the sink so as not to get the pajamas wet and me trying to spray the hair of a squirmy worm.

Who goes to the desk at the pool just about every time we are there for a bandaid?

Who decorated my coffee cup with half a box of Sponge Bob bandaids and a few princess stickers?

Who knocked my plant off the fireplace hearth while performing one of three shows in a night?

Why do we have three shows a night in our living room?

Who has worn "high heels" all week with every outfit and begged to wear them to school?

Who wore tall black boots with a Dora bathing suit, a silver belt and a beach hat to take Hemmer for a walk this evening? (I must figure out how to post the pic from my cell phone because it is hilarious!)

Why did I pack a bag for Hemmer to go to school today but I didn't pack one for Annie?

Who had a doughnut, a succer, cotton candy and a milkshake all within three hours this afternoon?

Who is the crazy person that gave her children all that sugar?

Who can't wait for a mini vacation next week? That would be me!

Who won't shut up while I'm trying to type this blog? That would not be either of my children! I hope they are close to sweet slumber.

Mommy, I found a possum...

2009-07-10T18:44:00.004-05:00

We play outside alot in our neighborhood. In the sixteen houses on our street live 20 kids. So, today, as the girls are riding their bikes and playing together (surprisingly) on the streeet because no one else was out, Beebs yells to Ev and me (on the front porch enjoying our fav beverage, beer), "Mommy and Daddy, I found a possum."

"Oh good for you," we say not thinking anything of it. Now, there is a clear plastic cup laying in the yard (and no, we're not white trash) because I forgot to bring it in Wednesday. The angels keep on riding their bikes and pushing Hemmer and Josephine (another story for another day) in their kid size buggies up and down from Mrs. Sandy's mailbox to Mrs. Jenn's mailbox because that's as far as they are allowed to go. Beebs keeps on bragging about the possum, to which we reply, "Yeah, a possum, that's so cool," still not thinking anything about it. Mr. Strong comes by with Charlie the dog and we chit chat, all the while the possum comments still flying around.

Then, in the blink of an eye, both girls are standing on the front porch with clear plastic cup full of what looks like leaves and dirt and nothing else in hand, saying, "Daddy, we're taking care of the possum, look, we gave him some dirt and leaves so he'll feel at home." Daddy, acting interested takes the clear plastic cup from Beebs and says, "Holy (something) there's a creature in there!"

Ev, Mr. Strong and I all take a closer look into the clear plastic cup. I'm thinking, "Holy (something) my precious angel has picked up a nasty animal!" Not a fan of a nasty animal. Inside the clear plastic cup we all three see tiny pink feet and gray fur. Lord help me, it's a freaking mole. Beebs has picked up a freaking mole and put it in a clear plastic cup with dirt and leaves. I thought for a second it might be a shrew because big cat, June Kitty Cash, kills them all the time and leaves them in the garage right below the laundry chute for me. But, no, it was a mole, just like in some children's book we have with a sweet little mole in it. But these little you know whaters will dig up all the beautiful grass and flowers we have worked so hard on. He is the ENEMY!

Daddy tells Beebs that our new little possum/mole friend would be a nice treat for June Kitty Cash. So, the angels take off to find her and present her with a gift. At this point, we are telling Mr. Strong goodbye. The angels are at the bottom of the driveway out of our sight calling for Junebug. As we turn the corner from the sidewalk onto the driveway we see Beebs pouring the contents of the "mole cup" over the fence to Josey Wales, the huge Lab Rottwieler mix baby dog that we love. By the way, he kills possum for fun!

Beebs has been checking on "that thang" as she is calling it. It's still kicking, but, at least Josey has a new toy which will end up like all of his other toys, shredded. Mr. Mole isn't dead yet, but at least we haven't done anything with the back yard yet so he (the enemy) can't tear it up. It should be an interesting evening at the Chapman castle.

"Take that Sharpie away from her..." my mother said

2009-07-08T20:29:00.005-05:00

as we were talking on the phone and Annie was telling me that she was going to use it for her tattoo. Life is funny, you know. You have this picture in your mind of how life will be with children, then you have these precious wonderful (insane) children who write on themselves with Sharpies over and over and over again. Think about June Cleaver for a minute. I am the exact opposite! As we were putting on our swim suits to go to the pool after dinner because Daddy wasn't home yet, I was DONE, and the children needed something to tire them out besides Benadryl, I looked around and realized that my house is an absolute disaster. Plus the fact that I am 38 years old and my mother still loves to tell me what to do. I understand though and I know that someday I'll do the same thing. Love you Mom!

Anyway, back to the Sharpie. It is now and always has been a black Sharpie. A fat one, a fine point, a medium point, but definitely permanent. It's been on her lips. "I use dat as lipstick, Mommy," she told me the first time. "Look I make you floors pretty," another. Legs, bathroom counters, walls, paper (my personal favorite because I can throw it away), and my dining room table, to name a few. Sorry Granny. It was only a small dot on the dining room table and it is still just as beautiful as the day you gave it to me! Just think of it this way Granny, someday we can look at the table and remember, well probably not dinner, but Annie writing on it with a Sharpie. I really should just throw them all out and believe me, I've tried, but they reappear. They are like, well I can't think of anything that reappears all the time right now, but whatever reappears, that's what Sharpies are in the Chapman castle.

Then there's Beebs. Good Lord I love that child. As I'm carrying Annie through the kitchen to her room (and she's screaming at the top of her lungs because she wants me to carry her), Daddy says, "What's wrong with her?" To which I reply, "She doesn't want to walk, she wants me to carry her to her D-A-M-N bed." (I was spelling that out for him so the children wouldn't be screaming damn at day school tomorrow). So, Beebs says, "I know you just said damn." I think she just wanted to say it, but curse learning to spell!

Now as I sit on the deck reflecting on my day (and working on my fav Corona Light), I realize that, oh here they come again. GET IN THE DAMN BED! But I'm only screaming it in my mind...this time!

Ark and Eben

2009-07-07T10:00:00.002-05:00

I taught the girls The Lord's Prayer and listen to them say it each night before they lay in their beds and play and get up 500 times after we've asked (yelled at them) not to and eventually go to sleep.

Here's their version, with a few lines from each Beebs and Annie, which I love and I'm sure when God hears it he gets a kick out of it. You know he has a great sense of humor (I mean look at us!)...

Annie: (these are just a few lines from Annie that I love, not her whole prayer) "Fadder ark and eben; on earth and eben; gibe us debts gibe us debtors" (Presbyterians say debts and debtors, not the other way)

Beebs: She says the whole thing perfectly, except "delete us from temptation". We all need to be deleted from temptation!

Rainy Days and Monday's - but I'm not down

2009-07-06T13:40:00.000-05:00

Well, this is my first post, so I'll give you a run down of the last week and maybe you'll figure out how a day in the life usually goes.

I was walking in the front door on Thursday and looked to my left as I was passing through the doorway. There it was, the face of Abe Lincoln, glued to the door frame, which led me to my new saying, "You know you live with Annie when...". So, you know you live with Annie when you find a penny glued to your door frame. "How did that get there," I say. "I do dat, Mommy," Annie answers.

Soon after, we were speeding down the front sidewalk on the toddler riding toy (which neither child really fits on anymore), which is part of our outside routine. I was watching and thinking, it's amazing that neither one has ever fallen off and hurt something really badly! Never think things like that, because then they happen. Sure enough, Beebs fell of and skinned her knee REALLY BADLY! Then she fell at Aunt Dena's pool the next day and skinned the same spot and I think at some point throughout the weekend, she did it again. She thinks Neosporin hurts and would not let me get close to her with it. So, I did what any good mother would do, I waited until she fell asleep and put the Neosporin and a band aid on it. Those were Beebs' 4th of July injuries. I got stung by a bee on the middle finger (I would show you if I could) on the 3rd. That's about the extent of my 4th injuries, besides the trauma my body suffered after participating in the Slip 'n Slide with my kids. Trust me, you really shouldn't do anything like that after a certain age! I realized that day that I am actually getting old. Annie, surprisingly, suffered minor injuries over our short holiday break. Very unusual for the messes she gets into. She did sleep all night in the tent in the back yard with Daddy on the 4th and was very excited about camping (she didn't get that from me, but I'm working on it).

Speaking of Daddy, his forehead is finally clearing up after his acrobats in the neighborhood pool - the very shallow end that is. He decided to show Beebs a back flipped and skinned his forehead. The scab has brought great laughter to my life for the past week! Beebs kept saying, "I told him he should go to the deep end, Mommy, but he didn't listen!"

So, I guess you get that we are all kind of clumsy and accident proned. Everett usually isn't, but he's had his share lately. Annie is usually the worst of us all, what with getting her finger stuck in the syrup bottle and her head stuck in her potty seat (very funny)! She brings great laughter into our lives too.

Beebs has taken to giving strikes to grown ups lately. You know, three strikes your out. That's how we go about punishment. She gave two to Nahnie (Dana) last night and hasn't even told her about it. The thing is though, and I told her, "You can't give Nahnie strikes for saying two bad words when you were eavesdropping on our phone conversation." This morning she was rambling about something Grandmama and I were talking about on the phone 2 weeks ago. Apparently, Elizabeth Rae is quite the Nosy Nelly!

I could go on and on, but I will leave you with this for now, yes, our blog name is from Queen's "We are the Champions" and we do sing it we are the Chapman's because that is what Everett did as a kid!