Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Ya gotta love...

when your baby (actually not so much a baby anymore, but my baby) falls asleep trying to finish reading "Ramona the Brave"!  I went in to kiss her goodnight and she begged me to let her finish it since she's had it checked out for, ummm, 3 weeks I think!  She only has 5 pages left, but she just couldn't make it.  Maybe during independent reading time tomorrow before library time?  I mean, she's read 177 pages in three weeks!  She's only in 2nd grade!  That ROCKS!!

when Annie poops in the potty 4 times in one day.  I told y'all she was full of it!  I made the rule that she cannot go on the playground at school with her friends until she poops.  Worked like a charm!  And, I made the rule that she can't play outside at home until she poops.  Worked like a charm...except that it didn't all come out when she was sitting on the potty!  Score: Mommy 5, Annie 2!  I'M WINNING!

when your best friends create the best birthday party ever for you!  My Chickens (official shout out to my angel girlfriends) are truly my sisters!  I love you G & D!  Y'all more than rock!!!  And, all my favorite girls  (Anna, Susan, Dana, Leigh and Emily) and fav hubby's of my fav girls came too!  Even my nephew and his precious angel girlfriend (Emily) came. 

Even though D spied on what I was wearing and decided it would be best if she wore the SAME EXACT shirt, I don't mind...

40 and rockin'!!!!

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Things I've learned, things I know to be true, and whole lotta nothin'...

In 40 years...I'm feeling nostalgic this week.  Like the end of an era and the beginning of a new one.  Like I need to go have my roots done real quick.  Like maybe I should do a lot of things different.  I think my next decade will be one of accepting my faults.

I have learned that patience are hard to come by.  It's okay to not act your age.  I have learned how to say no to my kids.  I like vampires named Edward Cullen.  The dollar movie is not all it's cracked up to be even though it's only a dollar.  I have the best husband in the world.  I am not sure how I got so lucky, but God and fate brought us together after 8 years of friendship, 2 years of dating and 14 years of marriage.  I have learned that being married to your best friend makes life way easier and way happier.  I have also learned that marriage takes a lot of teamwork, a whole lot of give and take and sometimes it's best to bite your tongue rather than say what's about to cross your lips!  I have learned to thank God every day for my Mom and to apologize to her every chance I get.  I have also learned that you truly do reap what you sow, so watch out.  I have learned that getting pregnant can take years, being pregnant sucks, giving birth is pretty easy (after the first one that is), and that raising kids is a lot harder than I thought it would be.  Being a Mommy, though, is the only job I ever wanted and it is the most precious job I've ever had.  I know that God intended for me to be the Mommy of girls, my girls, because I wouldn't know the first thing about peeing standing up and playing ball.  I have learned that 40 isn't old at all, it's a little wiser than 20, sounds more fun than 30, and it's right around the corner.

Poetry makes me happy; both writing it and reading it.  Barbie clothes laid out to dry on the bathroom counter crack me up!  I know I never would have made it as an elementary school teacher, which is what I aspired to be my entire life.  Instead, I take care of 1 person who really needs someone to care for him.  Caring for those who really need it is easy.  Having sympathy for those who bring the trials of life on themselves is really hard.  I think it is impossible.  Being grown up is not acting your age, rather taking responsibility.  Each time you buy a house, the mortgage gets a little bit higher.  Eight year old girls are competitive.  Who knew?  Four year old girls still have nap mat fits.  So do 40 year old girls, just not as often.  Sometimes the thought of one more chore is a chore to think about.  Mad Men is an awesome show!  Vacuum cleaners don't last long in my house.  The scent of lemon pine sol is much better than the original scent.  Having candles lit in your home is only for when adults are there.  Carpets should be cleaned once a year.  Toilets should be cleaned once a week or more.  Sheets should be changed once a week or more unless you weigh 40 pounds and sleep on 1 square inch of the bed.  Pets are a precious part of life.

I think it is hilarious when people pronounce words the wrong way and call things the wrong name.  You gotta laugh at something.  Being a smart-ass makes me who I am.  It's part of my coping ability.   I think that families should live close to one another.  Did I mention that I have an amazing husband?

It is very important to work as a team and listen to what others have to say.  Your way is not always the best way.

There are way more (hopefully) things that I have learned and that I know, but right now, what you see is what you get.  I do know that as I put my babies to bed tonight, I made sure to tell them that the two of them and their Daddy are the best people that have entered my life!

I know at 40 I am the luckiest GIRL in the world!!!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

The Nanny McPhee Pirate

Yes, THAT TOOTH is loose in my Beebs' head!  This week she has been Nanny McPhee, what with the tooth and all...

Don't you love the mole!?!?!?!
The pirate look comes in because this afternoon as she was sprinting home from the neighbors house, she fell on a stick that poked her in the eye.  The cold washrag (always a cure-all) HAD to be tied to her eye with a rubberband!  Her always resourceful Mommy (patting self on back) of course found a nice elastic headband that works great for that pirate patch (not so much for the hair, but great for the pirate look)...

A pirate in the making!

You know, if that tooth is still hanging on in about 5 weeks, she could really be Nanny McPhee for Halloween!

Baby Chick

This morning as Beebs was eating her boiled egg, minus the yolk of course, she asked me the sweetest question. 

"Mommy, is the yolk where the baby chick was?"

"Yes, it is Beebs," only half paying attention...until she asked...

"Well, how do they get the egg back in the shell after the baby chick comes out?"

I couldn't bear and wouldn't dare to tell her that she was eating the baby chick.  It would freak her out for life and she would never eat eggs again, which is the only thing she knows how to cook and someday she's going to have to take care of me!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

"Jesus told us not to eat each other's food, MOMMY!"

Yeah, I ate a bite of the Froot Loops, but they looked so yummy.  I have been walking REEEEEAAAAAAALLLLLLLYYYYYY early in the morning with my neighbor, and I am TIRED!  Why in the world is this wearing me out so?  Anyway, Annie and I came home this afternoon and had about an hour and a half before we had to get the Beebs from dance.  So I decided we should lay on the bed and watch Animal Plant (I would have rather watched Friends, 19 Kids and Counting or HGTV, but I needed her to want to stay inside!).  We watched "My Dog Ate What?".  Crazy show, weird stuff that they ate.  Anyway, I promptly dozed off.  Ahhhhhh.  She was very still.  Ahhhhhh.  She woke me up 10 minutes before we needed to leave to pick up the Beebs with a HUGE bowl of cereal.  

"You can't eat that in my bed," I told her.  "Let me carry it to the kitchen for you."  

She handed it over and we headed to the kitchen.  This is where the bite came in.  Dang Froot Loops are good!  They remind me of breakfast at my Granny's.  She would get up at 4 a.m. to make a huge breakfast, but she always gave us Froot Loops too, and a Coke.  She ROCKED!! (More later on my precious Granny, but as a preview, think of the best Granny EVER!  That was her!)

Anyway, she saw me eating her precious snack and blessed me out!  Yeah, she's 4...
"Mommy, why did you take a bite?  Now I have to add 4 more Froot Loops to my bowl to make up for the one's you ate!"  

"Fine," I told her as I was pouring my own bowl of the most delicious kid's cereal in the world.  

"You know Mommy, Jesus told us not to eat each other's food!" 

As I always say, only from the moufs of my precious angel babes!

"No, Annie, Jesus told us to share."

I swear, this kid uses Jesus way too much to get her way.  I am proud of all the Bible verses she's learning in her Pre-K class this year though.  You wouldn't believe what a little sponge mind can remember.

Monday, September 6, 2010

Goodbye Sweet Summer Rose...I'll miss you so (with a tear in my eye)!

Sweet Summer Rose, my dearest, most precious, angel self! I do love Summer!!! Apparently so does the Beebs. We went to the neighborhood pool for the LAST time today and stayed 'til the bitter end of the last Courtesy Break of the entire Summer. Ahhhhh, waaaaaaaahhhhhh, boo hoo! As we were leaving, the Beebs took the time to say goodbye to each pool chair, the diving board, the shallow end, the well, the deep end, the bathrooms and, of course, the HUGELY loved snack and drink machines. I, Summer (self) Rose, had tear-filled eyes as we pulled away. Daddy wondered why I sat in the back seat on the way home. It was because I didn't want him to see my cry:(.

Y'all, school is in full swing, dance too and Wednesday night church starts this week, but I can't quite grasp the fact that football is also in full swing and the pool is closed until May!

All I can say is, say a prayer for Summer Rose, cause she turns 40 in a month. Do ya think that helps the fact that summer is over? Huh, do ya? NO! My last summer as a GIRL (in my mind) is over! 40 isn't old though, is it?

Here is your que to leave a sweet comment about how young I am and how young I look...

Thursday, August 26, 2010

My onion letter (with an orchid note)...

A few years back, I read an article (I wish I could remember where, but I found a blog post about it here) about an onion letter and an orchid letter. I think it was written by a flight attendant and she told the dif between the two. The airline would get good letters and bad letters. The good were titled "orchid letters" and the bad, "onion letters". This is my take on an onion letter for all of you bloggers that might be interested!

Why is it when you go to a fast food restaurant (Chick-Fil-A last night) they insist that you get a medium drink with the Combo that you order? I'm just sayin'...

My sweet angels now like to order off of the "adult" menu at CFA. They no longer want the nuggets, but the chicken sandwich. Last night we had a treat for dinner. We had CFA. As I'm giving (screaming) my order over the loudspeaker, I requested a small lemonade with both "Combo #1's". The reply was, "Ma'am, the combos come with a medium drink."

"Okay," I answered.

But, why? Can't I just get what I want? After all, they are in the customer service industry sort of. I mean they are precious friendly people, really they are. But, I have two small children who have two small bladders and they will keep Daddy and me up all night with a MEDIUM lemonade. I.JUST.WANT.A.SMALL!!!!

Then, today I had to go to the FedEx store. Now, keep in mind that it is the FEDEX store. I didn't have the account number with me, but this shouldn't be a problem, because I'm at the FEDEX store. "Sir, I don't have the account number, could you look it up for me?" No, I don't have access to that information. How does the FEDEX store not have my FEDEX information. It is the FEDEX store, right? Then, he couldn't ring up my paper purchase at his register because his register was only for FEDEX SHIPPING. Again, can't find my shipping account number at the register/computer that was for FEDEX SHIPPING, and now, he can't take my money. Double whammy! I remembered as I stood there waiting for him to wrap my package (which took 30 minutes, but I did thank him for doing such a nice job), this is why I switched to UPS! So, the FedEx shipping experience was only used in a dire situation! That makes me wonder why there is no UPS Store within reach that I can use...should I write an onion letter about that?

Are all companies this difficult? I run into it all the time with my job. My job is to make a person's life easier. I do a really good job at that (patting self on back now). My boss and I are Colonel Potter and Radar. Isn't making life easier what these "customer service" oriented businesses are supposed to be about? I do it, why can't they?

I know, it's a soapbox, but does anybody hear the pleas of the simple American Mommy/Wife/Executive Assistant?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

On an orchid note, I had to contact my credit card company today and they were simply delightful! I cannot say enough about how pleasant and helpful Ms. Gonzalez was as well as Marcus. They were both so helpful and so kind! Thank you to them both!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Limos, The Hulk and Rattles, oh my...

As you may or may not know, I started this blog to keep family and friends up to date on all things Beebs and Annie (my two precious angels). So, here are a few outtakes from the last few weeks of life with words and sayings that only come from the "moufs" of my babes (should I change the blog name to that or what?)

Annie after a big storm we had a few weeks ago..."Mommy, should I go out in the yard and pick up all the 'LIMOS'?" You know, the limbs! Beebs wasted no time in correcting her, by the way. Like she knows what she's talking about, hence the Hulk.

Beebs going to work with me last week..."Mommy, there's the Statue of Liberty!" They get so excited about it and I hardly even notice it after 15 years of passing it daily. "Yep Beebs, she's facing downtown where her home was 20 years ago," I replied. "Mommy, do you think she's looking at the Hulk?" Beebs asked. "The Hulk? What in the world are you talking about?" I questioned. "You know, her boyfriend, the Hulk! The big statue with his butt (yes she said butt mother) showing!" she answered. "Ohhhhhhhh, you mean Vulcan! Yes, I think she's looking at Vulcan, who is her boyfriend, but not the Hulk, who turns green and his clothes rip off when he's mad." Yes people, only from the moufs of babes!

Yeah, rattles. Well, we had a mouse (most likely a rat, but Daddy didn't want to freak me out too bad), that lived in our walls last winter. We could hear him scratching around inside the walls day and night. All I could picture was Jerry from "Tom and Jerry" making that little arch shaped hole in the wall so he could come out at night and get something from the fridge. Anyway, Annie was laying (rolling around like a wild idiot) on our bed the other day and we heard something. I can't remember exactly what it was now, but I'm pretty sure it was Daddy messing around in the garage. I do know that it wasn't the mouse/rat because I'm pretty sure it's not in the hot attic or walls during the hottest time of the year! Anyway (again), I told Annie to hush (shut her big fat mouth - not really, but only in the minds of Mommies) so we could figure out what the noise was. Please note that she (and Beebs and Daddy) talks non-freaking-stop and I haven't been able to hear myself think through the major part of my thirties, aka post-kid! After the whole shushing thing, Annie said (in her non-freaking-stop talking kind of way), "Hey Mommy, I fink de Rattle is back." Yes folks, she was talking about the mouse/rat. Apparently, Daddy told them it was a rat. Hmmmm, maybe that's why they won't go downstairs by themselves...

I'm tellin' y'all, only from the moufs of babes!

Saturday, August 14, 2010

My happy place...

Thank you Rhoda at Southern Hospitality! You are an inspiration! I first saw Rhoda's staircase redo over at The Lettered Cottage. My stairs had been in a world of hurt for quite a while. You see, they are hardwood, but had been stained in, oh, 1963 or 1964 when our house was built. Then, they had a weird rubber old lady runner thing on them, then they had been covered in carpet, which was absolutely, ridiculously disgusting when we moved in and I was 6 months pregnant. Note to self and all those in blog world, please don't EVER move when you are pregnant, especially if your "new" old house has 1960's paneling and carpeted stairs!!! I cried and I cried and I cried and I almost made Daddy cry when I said, "I think we bought the wrong house!" on the day we closed. But, ugly 1960's paneling is something that can be beautified with a little paint, Praise the Good Lord, and thank Him for great parents who paint because you can't/shouldn't when you are 6 months pregnant!!! But, I digress. So, here are my stairs to begin with...

So, yes, quite hideous! I know you are asking yourself, "Why, why in the world have you lived with this for 5 LOOOOONNNNNGGGGG years?" Well, let me just tell you that they were carpeted when we moved in. We had all the carpeting replaced (it was nasty and was an absolute requirement from an insane pregnant woman who asked Daddy to dig up Jasper the Cat that we had buried in the back yard of our last precious home to move him to the back yard of our new/old home so he would still be with us...another story for another day). The stairs were carpeted when we bought the house, so we assumed we would just replace the carpet on the stairs as well. Bing, bang, boom and DONE. Not so fast! When the carpet layers (also puller uppers) took the carpet off the stairs, they realized that the "down" stairs were hardwood just like the "up" stairs. We live in a split foyer home (I swore I would never live in a split foyer home because they were TOO dark, but I do love our home, and I knew it would be our home the minute we walked in, pink walls, 1960's tile, hideous wallpaper, paneling and all). Again, digressing. The moral of that whole story is, don't listen to Daddy when he says, "Don't let them put carpet on the stairs! I'll refinish them since they are hardwood." Yeah, that didn't happen and I wasn't holding my breath after 5 years. Love you my precious hubby, but you are a bit behind on the DIY's:)!

Almost 5 years and many blog and Google searches later, I came across Rhoda's stair redo on The Lettered Cottage. Okay friends, now we are up to speed. I do love me some background so you can get the gist of everything...

So, I went to Lowe's and got some Crown NEXT Paint Strip environmentally friendly paint and varnish stripper (and installed myself a pole...ha ha) and got to work. Here's how my steps looked after the stripper (pole and all...ha ha)...

First, let me emphasize the importance of safety goggles. No, they don't particularly work when you have them on your head! Yes friends, I had them holding back my hair that was hanging in my eyes blocking my view of properly "STRIPPING" my stairs. As you can imagine, I flung some of the paint stripper in my eye and had to flush for 15 (3) minutes and throw away my brand new pair of disposable contacts. Oh, I was fine! It was just a little and I still have my eyesight 2 weeks later. So, I know, right, the stairs are still crappy, but my toenails look pretty in the picture! Daddy was still hanging on to the whole "I'll refinish them" thing. I'm thinking that would require a professional, which we are not! Sorry Daddy, you're a pro at a lot of stuff, but...

Next, I primed, and even the primer made me so happy! I also primed the wall/paneling around each riser and tread where there was no primer or paint due to it being painted before the old carpet was pulled up 5 years earlier. Oh, and did I mention that I did all of this when my two crazy kids were at the beach with my Mommy (shout out to Mommy who loves it when her 30-something daughter calls her Mommy - and she is the greatest Mommy in the world - overboard? maybe a little). Anyway, she took my kids away so I could ACTUALLY complete a project, so I gotta give her what she wants, my Mommy that is:)! And, drum roll please, here are my steps primed...

Lovely, right. Once the primer was dry, I set out with my Valspar Porch and Floor paint in "something" black (can't remember the exact name and the paint is downstairs and I'm not getting up to walk down there now even though I would like to see my pretty stairs, what with all this talk about them). Please note that I do tend to get paintbrush happy whenever I am holding one in my hands. I had the bright idea, which came back to haunt me later, that the parquet entry floor should be black too. I just tested it out a little. I'd love to show you, but it might ruin the finished product picture I have saved up. Let me just say that Daddy didn't like it. As a matter of fact, he said, "Why'd you paint the foyer floor?" As in, you crazy, paint brush-holding woman, step away from the paint can and put DOWN the brush! That brush happy mistake only took an HOUR to SCRAPE off.

So, after many (kidless) hours of working on my stairs, a little "stripper" in the eye, some scraping due to "brush-happy" hands, lots of primer and a little porch and floor paint from Lowe's, here is my finished product...

Oh, and I painted the end posts and railings too (told you I am brush happy), but left the spindles white. That small touch updated the entire area. I am telling you that my entry way is now a happy place to be! I also had a pedicure in the midst of all of this and picked out a fabulous purple called "Can You Dig It" by OPI.

Let me also mention that I found the cutest, most precious half round table that is perfect for my foyer, along with a great iron candle stick and a green cross as accessories at The French Flea. And here is a picture of that...

Thanks for stopping by to see my stair redo that was totally inspired by Southern Hospitality!

I still have some molding to add and some paint touch up to do and maybe a poly top coat to add that will help with the crazy kids scuffing it all up, but for now, I am in my happy place!

Monday, August 9, 2010

The Eiffel Tower and Lillian's

Summer Rose (previous post) is sad, cause it's all officially coming to an end this week! No more sleeping late, no more staying up late, and the week of QUIET has officially ended. Yes, my precious Mama and Papa took my kids home with them last week and let me just tell you that they had a blast!!! They were at the beach for an entire week! What kid could ask for more? Of course, the wild woman came down with a horrible Strep Rash one day in and Mama had to find a pediatrician close to home who confirmed the illness. Then, Mama caught the same highly contagious rash, with a vengeance! Love you Mommy!!! Thank the Good Lord Beebs and Papa didn't get it. The rash didn't stop them from having a good time (sorry to those of you that went to see Toy Story 3 at the same time, went to the indoor pool at the same time, and the kids' fav restaurant at the same time). Nope, you can't stop Mama from having a good time...

On the day when Mama's rash was the worst, Papa took the girls to the Naval Museum, which they absolutely loved! Not sure if they loved the Naval Museum as much as they loved hanging with Papa for an entire day, but it was cool! After the Naval Museum, Papa took them to a real lighthouse. They climbed (seriously, lots of stairs) all the way to the top. They were about 10 steps from the top when they came across a little guy (Beebs says he was going into 1st grade, although I'm not sure how she knew that what with all the crying he was doing) he was freaking out about going back down the stairs. Papa secretly freaked out at this point, cause he thought this was going to make the girls freak out! When I asked them later if they got scared when they saw how scard the little boy was, Beebs said, "No, he just made my head hurt because he was soooooooooooo loud!" I'm telling you, only from the moufs of babes! Anyway, they called me that night to fill me in on the days events, and I got to talk to Annie first. Annie's gig on the phone is, "Mommy, I need to tell you sumfin." To which I always reply, "Okay, tell me."

This time, what she told me made me laugh out loud and almost fall on the floor! "Mommy, we climbed de Eiffel Tower today!"

"You did what? I didn't know Papa took you all the way to Paris!"

Then, I hear Mama in the background, "No, Annie, you went to a lighthouse." I guess in a four year old mind, a lighthouse with all its stairs is kind of like the Eiffel Tower. But, how in the world does she know what the Eiffel Tower is? It's gotta be a Disney Channel thing...

We finally, after the quietest week EVER, arrived to gather up the children and spend one night with my precious Mama and Papa before heading to our old stomping ground, which is my dad's beach place! We had a great time with Mama and Papa (aka, Mr. Old Fashioned, which is my blog shout out to Papa - "that's what I'm talkin about RIGHT THERE! - love you Pops). Anyway, we had a fun little family mini-vacay with the kids! We took them to eat at Lillian's Pizza, which is one of our all time fav's!!! It used to sit right on the beach, until one of the hurricanes knocked it OUT! Anyway, they rebuilt, but this time, across the street from the beach. Still great food (and wine), but across the street. As we were pulling in, Daddy was showing the girls where it used to be before the hurricane. To which Beebs promptly replied, "Did the hurricane move it across the street?" Ahhh, I'm telling you, only from the moufs of babes!

Again, see the previous post about the things that come out of my babes "moufs". It's truly the reason I write this blog! They crack me up daily!

So, to sum it up, Summer Rose is happy about the fun we had this summer and so happy that it ended on a happy note! This post is just a little reminder of how much fun we had with Mama and Papa. Thanks y'all! This one's for you two lovebirds and the best grandparents two (or seven) little ones could ever ask for!!!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

The Napmat Fit

Dear Daddy (and all other Daddies, husbands, brothers, future husbands...), I do understand your struggles with the gals in your life. We are only happy when things go our way. Why just today I told my good friend Dee that Daddy doesn't understand that my plan is the best plan, always, end of story. But, please try to understand the hormonal shifts that are ingrained within us. Why, we are born with all of the eggs that our ovaries will produce throughout our lifetime. We go through puberty and bleed from strange places. Some of us take hormones to help us have babies and then again when all of the period madness stops and the menopause starts. We carry babies in our bodies for 40 weeks and then GIVE BIRTH to them. GIVE BIRTH to them (I had to say that one more time, because we GIVE BIRTH to them as in birthing, you know, watermelon through a nostril, birth). Then we breast feed those precious angels and our boobs hang really low and sad. The only thing left to hold them up is the stretch marked belly that held that precious angel baby. Thank God for the belly! Anyway, Daddy's, husbands, brothers, future husbands..., here's a little story to help you through the madness of living with girls. And remember, we are VERY LOVING (especially when we get our way).

When our sweet precious Beebs was just a tiny tot, she had what we lovingly refer to now as a "napmat" fit. Let me fill you in...Beebs was 2 and moving into the nap room and out of a Pack and Play. Huge step for us all. So, I took her to Penney's and let her choose a napmat for day care. We picked a pretty pink one with hearts and diamonds on it. We brought it home and she proudly showed it off to Daddy. Then, as we put her to bed that night, and keep in mind that she was two and not really showing signs of The Terrible Twos yet, she had the mother of all fits...the NAPMAT fit! She sounded like Linda Blair in The Exorcist. "NAPMAT! I WANT MY NAPMAT!" She said it over and over and over and, well I'm sure you understand. It went on for a while and Daddy and I stood and stared at her then one another, then back at her, then back at each other with the look of "this child is possessed and what in the #@!& do we do with her!" I'm not really sure what happened after that, because sometimes a mother must block those fits from her mind. I'm sure we didn't give in though. I think we probably did what I did tonight and walked out closing the door behind us, because as this mommy likes to say, "no one wants to hear you acting like that". Except tonight, she's not 2, she's SEVEN AND A HALF and she wanted to stay up later than 8:30, except, she has been up until 10:30 or later for the past two weeks and she is worn out. So, she wasn't getting her way. Again, as the mommy in this case, my plan is always the best plan, end of story!

Anyway, I did what any good mother would do. I got the video camera. Of course the battery was dead, but she didn't know that. I opened the screen and acted as if I was filming her. I know what you're thinking, "Dang that's a good momma!", but wait...there's more. She flipped out when she realized I was "filming" her and begged me not to show it to anyone. To which I replied, "Oh, I'm just filming this to send in to Nanny 911."

"You can't let her come get me," she was really scared now (insert evil laugh here).

"Of course not, I'm just going to show her this video and see if she has any ideas on how to deal with napmat fits since you and Annie seem to have them ALOT lately!"

"You can't show that video to any of my friends!" Of course with the typing, the Linda Blair doesn't quite come through, so just play it out in your mind.

"Why, Beebs, are you ashamed of the way you are acting?"

"Yes and if my friends saw it, I would be so embarrassed!"

"Perhaps you should think about that before you have another napmat fit then."

Keep in mind, Annie and I were laughing the whole time. Annie just kept dying laughing, which made me laugh even harder. Now usually I would yell back, but I was extremely calm and Annie kept laughing. I really surprised myself.

I only wish that video camera would have worked so I could show her that video tomorrow. I'm going to charge it right now so I can video the next napmat fit. I think I'm onto something here!

Friday, July 16, 2010

Who threw away my wedding dress?

I know I'm not alone in this, but my kids say (and do) the weirdest things! So, Annie and Beebs got their own "spongy things" (that's what I call them). You know those things you put liquid body wash on and bathe with, yeah those. Anyway, Annie immediately took to tearing hers apart and it's white. She usually takes to tearing things apart rather quickly. That's just her gig (previous post). Slowly, but surly, she has picked and picked and picked and picked some more until she finally freed it from the string that was holding it all together. She has lots of time for these activities, because we let her play in the tub for a few extra minutes, you know like hours on end. Hey, if she's in the tub, she's not cutting hair, taping multiple papers to the wall in the hallway, putting Chapstick on Hemmer, Bitty and the bathroom mirror, or drawing on the walls or herself with Sharpie (yes, she does all of the things and more - please see previous posts for detailed descriptions). But I digress and must get back to the matter at hand! I heard her calling for me from the tub last night, saying, "Moooooooommmmmmmmyyyyyy, I'm getting married." Now, this is not an odd statement from either of my kids. We've had numerous weddings in the living room and Annie talks about getting married all the time and how her husband is gone to work, but he will be back soon to pick up Bitty and get the picture.

Anyway, she wanted me to come see her "Wedding Dress". "It's beautiful and white!" she said.

I slowly (praying that the bathtub was not full of toilet paper) made my way to the bathroom and peeked in to see the creation that was a beautiful and white wedding dress. Yes, my friends, it was the spongy thing all picked apart, but in one very long piece and wrapped around my bride to be. And, yes it was very beautiful even if a little gal made it out of a spongy thing. Maybe not an engineer, but a designer of all things strange and lovely.

I found the wedding dress laid out beautifully in her floor last night after she was asleep and decided to save myself the time of picking up pieces of it that had been cut to shreds by the High School Musical scissors and go ahead and throw it in the trash. HUGE mistake!!! This morning my little angel came running to me with tears streaming down her face asking, "Who threw away my wedding dress?"

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Annie's swimmin' and diamond necklaces

This is straight from the "mouf" of my Beebs...

"annie swam as good as a whale! her lifeguard was my swim teacher last year and my dad talked to a lifeguard and said, "annie needs to be moved to a different group, cause she's a way better swimmer than that." I laughed - ha ha - and I think that she is a good swimmer except at swim lessons, last year, with my coaches, his nickname was Crazy Corey!"

Thank you, my Beebs!

So, yesterday as I was getting dressed for work, I put on a necklace and earrings and, as usual, I checked with Beebs to make sure it looked okay with my outfit. Now, the necklace, which is total costume jewelry, has a big HUGE diamond (piece of cut glass), and Beebs replied, "Oh, Mommy, DIAMONDS go with everything!"

You gotta love the things that come out of the "moufs" of babes!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Directions for the Caesar Salad?

No, this post is not about me making dinner! Ha, that would be hilarious. No, really, I do cook every once in a while, but only when I absolutely have to. Anyway, Daddy and I decided to have Grilled Chicken Caesar Salads for dinner last night. So, he headed out to the grocery to get the Romaine and shredded Parmesan Cheese. Well, I guess he figured out when he got to the store, that he wasn't sure if we had all the other ingredients. So, he called. Beebs answered (as usual) and came running in the kitchen questioning me.

"Hey Mommy, Daddy needs to know if we have DIRECTIONS for the Caesar Salad?"

"Huh?" I said.

She repeated (kind of like Uncle Lewis in Christmas Vacation - yes, I do love me some Chevy Chase - as he is holding is hands up to his mouth showing Aunt Bethany that they want her to say Grace, as in "the blessing"), "D I R E C T I O N S!", which she practically yelled at me like I was the idiot.

I calmly (ha ha) replied, "Directions for the Caesar Salad? I think Daddy knows how to make a Caesar Salad! Just give me the phone!"

All I hear on the other end of the line is Daddy dying laughing!!!

Apparently, Daddy needed to know if we had DRESSING for the Caesar Salad. Only from the "moufs" of babes...(that's from an older post and I think I might have to copyright it since I use it so much!

Thursday, July 1, 2010

What's your gig?

Definition of gig: noun, A job, especially a booking for musicians.


I say it all the time. Really, that's just my gig. See, I just said it right there. I am not sure why I started using this word, but I do that. I'll use a word or phrase for a while and then retire it. Like "preaching to the choir", that was my gig for a while.

My gig right now is...well, of course, Summer Rose (see previous post). Summer Rose does love listening to the crickets while sitting on the deck drinking a nice cold beverage. My everyday gig is rambling on and on (as you might have noticed), but I make myself laugh, and that's all that counts, really, it is. My gig this week was not so much fun, what with my Josey Wales going to Heaven. Our gig on Saturday is the funeral for JoJo.

Beebs' gig tonight is a sleepover and wanting her sister to be as far away from her as possible, so thank the Good Lord that...

Annie's gig is "Annie's lights are out..." (see previous post and yes, we love it when the wild kid falls out) Praise the Good Lord!

Daddy's gig, as usual, is cooking me some good dinner! Tonight, it is I-talian (southern pronunciation) sausage with some yummy sauteed veggies!!! Daddy is the best cook and absolutely the BEST HUSBAND IN THE WORLD!

My 4th of July gig is making a flag cake (not as fancy as TDC's pink, aqua and white cake, click on my handy dandy Thrifty Decor Chick button to see her post about that cake, which is hilarious), but just a regular old cake (from the box, of course), with cool whip icing, strawberries and blueberries as the stars and stripes. I make it almost every 4th, so that must be my 4th gig!

Nahnie's gig (that's my sis) is listening to a band that's having a gig at a sweet little place downtown. She needs to go to bed!!!

Mama and Papa's gig is, hopefully, going to see the Jimmy Buffet tribute to the GULF concert in Gulf Shores.

Everyone's gig right now should be, SAVING THE GULF! The Good Lord knows that BP ain't doin' nothin' about it, so let's everybody go on vacation and clean up what we can while we're there!

So, what's your gig? Let me know...

(BTW, I love a "dot, dot, dot"...have you figured that out yet?)

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

The Outlaw, Josey Wales Chapman

Dog is man's best friend, and woman's and child's! Our precious Josey Wales went to Heaven today. He was such a sweet boy! I am sitting here waiting for him to rub his slobbery mouth on my leg or almost demolish the deck by scratching his own belly. Yes, he was HUGE, but he was just a big 'ole baby. He was a Rottweiler Lab mix, he weighed 110 pounds, Daddy taught him to sit and I taught him to shake with one paw, then the other. He could have been on Letterman's "Stupid Pet Tricks", because he could hike his squeaky toy football through his legs, just like the center for the Auburn Tigers (or the other team if Daddy was telling this story). That is until he tore it to shreds like every other toy or collar or name tag we ever gave him. I think he might have actually swallowed the "indestructible" name tag I had etched for him stating that he was Josey Wales Chapman. We finally started giving him empty water bottles, because they were cheaper than buying new dog toys once a week. He could tear up a newspaper in a matter of seconds. He could tear up a dog bed in a matter of minutes. Literally, it took him 5 minutes to tear up the bed we bought for him in March. He could gnaw at his own leg or a Boston Butt bone for hours. He could dig a hole so deep that the dirt was cool and gave him a nice soft bed. He was a great "horse" first for Beebs, then for Annie to ride on! He was our first big dog and he made me feel safe. He barked at the gas meter reader from the time he heard his truck pull into our little town and wouldn't let up until he heard him leave our little town. Mr. Meter Reader always said, "We do this dance every month!" He carried a really big metal rod with him. I guess he was afraid of JoJo. Josey howled at the fire trucks every time they left the station with their sirens on. He even taught the neighbor dogs to howl at them too.

Our backyard will never be the same. The plants and trees I have planted will probably stay in tact, but the yard will probably be overrun by the possums and raccoons that he loyally chased away. The squirrels won't be afraid to come on the deck anymore (unless Daddy gets that bee bee gun he's been wanting).

Josey loved Daddy and me and Beebs and Annie and we all loved him so very dearly. I know dogs come and go more quickly than we do, but somehow, they settle right into your heart just like one of your children. I'm just happy that Daddy and I rescued him and gave him a home and a family that loved him for his 9 years on earth. Our family will have a little piece missing because he's not here with us anymore, but, all dogs do go to heaven...

Saturday, May 29, 2010

The Maladies of "Nunya" and "The Tick"

Well, I started this post a couple weeks ago and am just now adding the text! Helllllllo, Summer Self, wake up and get with the posts! Anyway, let me tell you about the maladies...

"Nunya": def.: what i tell my kids when they butt in on my conversations with Daddy. In other words, "It's NUNYA business!" Anyway, Annie had Nunya. I know sweet, sad, quiet (yeah, right, I'm quiet), somewhat depressed and definitely not tan, Winter Self did not tell you about Annie's Nunya. But, my baby had Pneumonia in February. It was very scary for all of us (me), first because it snowed on that Friday in our little town in Alabama. Now, if you haven't been in Alabama when it snows, let me fill you in. Everything SHUTS DOWN! So, it snowed, my mama had been here, Annie had been coughing a little and mama told her not to play in the snow or she'd catch Pneumonia. I am a firm believer in knocking on wood, which no one did at that particular moment in time, unfortunately. At 11 p.m. I ventured out in the "blizzard" to get some Tylenol to alternate with the Motrin that my precious neighbor gave me. Thanks K! So, point is, Annie had Pneumonia, which she affectionately has renamed "Nunya". It sounds the same and it was hilarious when she told me, after the tick incident, "Mommy, remember when I had Nunya and had to get a shot!?!" Furthermore, when we were leaving the wonderful Chuck E. Cheese the other night after A's 5th birthday party, we walked out with Mimi and Pawpaw H, A's grandparents. Mimi and Pawpaw live at the lake and we went to visit 2 summers ago. Pawpaw had taken care of Aunt Lele's pet bird Sunny since she moved out long time ago and Beebs fell in love with the bird. Well, as we were walking out with them, I was reminding Beebs of our visit and playing with Sunny. As she, in the sweetest 7 year old way, was remembering, Pawpaw said, "Yep, Sunny's dead. I left him downstairs all Winter and he got too cold, caught Pneumonia and died!". Beebs was horrified, but all Annie had to say (once again), was, "Hey Mommy, member when I had Nunya and had to get a shot?" Only from the moufs (again with my previous posts, you'll have to go back and read it if you haven't already!) of babes!

On to the Tick! Summer self sends Beebs to Day School with Annie, because I must tackle the commercial real estate world (I really don't tackle, just take care of 3rd child - previous post). There was one day where I had to ask our sweet Mrs. F and precious Baby M to bring them home. That was the day we were leaving to visit Granny in Kentucky, or just plain ole "Tucky" as Annie calls it (could be worse). Anyway, Mrs. F made sure to tell Daddy that she had checked them for ticks because some of the Day School kiddos had them after being on the playground. Daddy failed to mention this to me and you know what happened...guess...Beebs found the tick on her own head. Now that was not immediately after F told Daddy to check, noooooo, it was 2 days later, while we were at Granny's (Daddy's mama), at around 11 p.m. as they were STRUGGLING to go to sleep. So, we carried Mr. Tick all the way from our little town, over the river and through the woods, to Granny's house. And, we played with cousins with Mr. Tick, and we had meals with Mr. Tick and we swam in Granny's pool with Mr. Tick. Anyway, in true Beebs fashion (she's a little bit like her mama, God love her), she was taking down her ponytail, rubbing the back of her head and then, screaming bloody murder. Well, Daddy in his infinite talk radio wisdom, told us that he needed baby oil STAT, which Granny promptly returned with. I didn't even know they made baby oil anymore. We used to use it for "sunscreen". Daddy had heard a doctor on the radio talking about ticks and using baby oil to make them back out of the skin they were attached to. (My skin is crawling just typing this.) After several douses with the baby oil and several very long minutes of freaking out (Beebs and me), and several suggestions (by me) of using the tweezers, Daddy finally caved on the baby oil gig and asked for the tweezers. Yes, I am the expert on tick removal as I had to pull one out of Aunt D's ear on our way to the beach in, oh, about '97 or '98 and let me tell you that the tweezers saved us. That story is what calmed Beebs after the tick had been flushed! But, Aunt D's tick is another story for another post.

Thank you Mommy (patting myself on the back), for taking care of me through the Nunya, for always being the expert on all things tweezers and tick removal, for finding my DS charger, for having Sponge Bob Band-aids when we have pool toe, for letting us watch Sweet 16 on Disney, for making us separate dinners so we can each have what we want, for helping me clean my room, for letting me eat the ice cream I just fixed for myself, and most of all, for letting us sit in the way back of your car! Mommy, you rock, and your tan is awesome!!!

Did I go a little overboard? Sometimes somebody's gotta pat ya on the back, even if it is yourself...

Thursday, May 20, 2010

"Annie's lights are out...", said my precious Beebs

"Mommy, Annie's lights are out!" Only from the moufs (see earlier post) of Beebs (no, not babes, but Beebs). Annie, after a small (in Annie's grand scheme of things) fit over me making her take off her panties so she wouldn't poop in them (again, earlier post), a large dinner of fish sticks, fries and black beans and corn (and no, Annie didn't "crap" corn - sort of our little take on "Jimmy cracked corn"), and an even larger bath full of Barbie's and whatever else they can find to put in the tub, Annie decided a little "America's Funniest Videos" was in order for her in Mommy and Daddy's big bed. While Beebs and I did a small craft for a teacher gift (please see the picture below - very impressed with ourselves!), Annie laid up in the king size to watch a little AFV. After some time, Daddy asked, "Hey, where is Annie?" Yes, we do a fantastic parenting job! Who knows, she could have been next door! Anyway, I mentioned to Daddy her plan that involved the king size and AFV and we all decided that she was either a. engrossed in TV, or 2. (Fletch reference) "out like a light". Now, out like a light is our little term for "Thank the Good Lord this child is asleep!" When Annie is asleep, we know that nothing (body parts, walls, sometimes - rarely - paper) is being written on with a black Sharpie, no fingers are getting stuck in syrup bottles, no arms are getting stuck in the handle to the oven door, no heads and shoulders are getting stuck in the Dora potty seat, and best of all, NO HAIR IS GETTING CUT!

So, Beebs and I finished our craft/teacher gift and she looked at me and said (spoken like a true 7 year old), "I am SO not going to check on Annie!"

To which I replied (spoken like a true, um, well 7 year old), "I SO don't expect you to!"

She disappeared down the hall to put her teacher gift in her backpack. A few minutes later she returned to inform me, "Annie's lights are OUT!"

I said, "Don't you mean she's out like a light?"

"No, Mommy," she replied, "her eyes are closed, her brain is sleeping, that means her lights are out!" Ahhh, the logic! And then she ran off to watch another Justin Bieber video on YouTube.

I just thank the Good Lord that Beebs didn't knock her lights out. It could happen...

Now, tell me what you think about our teacher gift. In case you can't tell from the small picture, they are note cards with animals, bugs and shapes made out of the little angels fingerprints. Daddy thinks we should make a bunch and sell them on eBay. It could happen...but, would you buy them?

Friday, May 14, 2010

Oooo y'all I do love a day at home by myself...

So, I worked from home today until (about 10 minutes ago) about 11:00 a.m. In between taking care of my 3rd child (I'm an Executive Assistant to the same man for 15 years, so yes, I can call him my 3rd child, 4th if you count Daddy), I managed to mop the hideous kitchen floor (another story for another day), which is already destroyed again and do 1 load of laundry, which I haven't folded yet...Anyway, I was at home by myself. I know you are saying, "How, how in the world did you manage to be at home by yourself? I have seen all the complaining you do about your jobs and volunteering," (again, need to have a happy heart!). Thank you for your concern, but, I managed. I texted 3rd child (or 4th, however you want to look at it) at 10:30 last night when we were wrapping up our day and politely asked (begged) him if he minded me working from home since he was travelling. Third (or 4th) child graciously offered me that small sacrifice. I do love my 3rd (or 4th) child!

Anyway, after 11 a.m. (and walking the Beebs to school, which made both of us very happy:), I got a wild hair and decided to paint my blue table. Now, I bought that blue table from neighbor Nini's (that's her grandma name, but she is soooooo not grandma"ish") garage sale about a year ago and it fits perfectly for the spot I chose. I loved the turquoise color of it and that's why I bought it from Nini. Still do. It was the color of our dining and living room in our first (very tiny) house. needed some freshening and since I like to reuse the leftover paint that we have in the garage, I painted it Homestead Resort Moss. Yes, that is the color of my bathroom and the little (in very bad shape) antique table that I got from Daddy's grandparents house (told you I reuse paint). I still have half a gallon left, so who knows what else will be painted Homestead Resort Moss. Anyway, the messy blue was killing me because I couldn't (no matter what I did) fix the stains, etc. I do love all things weathered, but this was just TOO much for me to deal with. So, (drum roll) there it is. Still in it's blue form. Please excuse the garage:). The top is already painted green in this picture, but apparently, my fantastic photography skills did not capture that. Tomorrow, I will finish it and show you the beauty that it is in my next post!

The other thing I got into (my wheels were turning as Daddy would say), is painting Aunt Sunny's birdcage. It was green, and now it is a beautiful baby blue with two beautiful baby girls holding it. Oh yeah, they have beautiful baby blue eyes (just like their Daddy)! Again with the drum roll, here it is with the beautiful blue eyed Beebs and Annie holding it...

Oh my, I can't wait to hang it in it's perfect little corner in the den. More to come...

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Summer Rose, Summer Rose the 2nd and Summer Rose the 3rd

My old friend is returning from the frozen tundra of wintertime. And here she is, summer self! I knew I should have named one of my kids Summer Rose! Perhaps I'll change my name to Summer Rose! Seriously, the winter time was depressing! Nothing made me feel better! I have been sweating here in Alabamy now for a good two weeks. That is, up until yesterday when it was 56 degrees. I'm sorry, but once it's been 89, there is no turning back for me! School is almost over. Dance is almost over. The other VARIOUS things I have volunteered for (and bitched about, which doesn't make a true volunteer because I wasn't giving of my time unselfishly and next Fall remind me not to spread my time so thin) are almost over. And, the neighborhood pool opens next weekend. Friend Susie has her pool open, and oh yes, Summer Rose the 2nd and Summer Rose the 3rd have both been in Susie's pool!

Annie (aka for this summer, Summer Rose the 3rd) is making huge strides in going to the potty. I know you that know her are thinking, "She is 4 and 1/2 years old!" Don't judge me, she's spoiled rotten and lazy. Basically, she should have been a boy and may be just like her Daddy! I don't know what else to do, but I am making huge strides! She has made it through the night dry for the past three weeks only because I took a stand against the racket that is what you and Target may call Pull-Ups. "I'm a big kid now" my thumb! Anyway, Annie is moving up to the 4K class, so we have another year to make sure she is good and trained before she goes to Kindergarten. Also, that means that I only have one more year of doing the Day Care's books in exchange for free Day Care. Free Day Care, my thumb!

Beebs has made it through 1st Grade like a champ. There were some times I wasn't so sure about her, but the last spelling test proved me wrong. 11/10 and 100% on sentence structure. You can't ask for more than that (although, I would if I knew how). I want her to make all A's. Don't we always want better for our kids! She only had one boyfriend this year, because I told her it wasn't allowed! Get this though, when he asked her to be his girlfriend, she said, and I quote, "I don't know, I'll have to ask my mom." How awesome is she!?! I ran through all of the questions, like why would you want to be his girlfriend and why do you like him. Her resounding answer was, "Because he's my friend." What more can you ask of a precious 7 year old!?!

Daddy's (our) A&E Landscaping & Lawn Care is taking off! We have a couple of new clients this year, so we are slowly building it up. I found a great deal (at on everything marketing. We have car door magnets, yard signs and business cards as well as our very own logo! More on that later. Maybe I can even upload our logo to my blog. What a concept!

I am planning minor home redos, not renovations, but redos. Renovations take too much time and should be saved for the winter. Thanks to my new friend "The Lettered Cottage", my first project is to paint my steps that were covered in carpet. You see, when we moved into our house 5 years ago, we had the carpet replaced. Daddy told the carpet layers not to put carpet on the stairs because he was going to refinish those. Yep, they're still in the same sorry state. And, it wouldn't be so bad, but ours is a split foyer home, i.e. the first thing you see when you come in. So, I'm going to paint those according to the step by steps I found (no pun intended), re-paint the entire downstairs: den, entryway, bathroom, bedroom and all ceilings. Grandmama and Daddy are going to be contracted to help and Lord only knows what we'll do with the children! I promise to add before and after pics. I think I finally figured it out...

So, here I am, back in your good graces, with my bathing suit in one hand and my Corona Light in the other! Life could not get any better than life with Summer Rose...